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Not All That Glitters Is Gold I’ve always been submissive, and when I look back at my life, I see signs from as far back as I can remember. It wasn’t until my late twenties that I started to label those feelings and desires. I had been living for years as a bottom, only in the bedroom, and realized what it was I had been missing for so long. I started searching for the missing piece, finally believing I wasn’t just broken. I started seeking dominance that existed past the bedroom’s threshold. I found that many men were eager to offer their assistance. I showed them the gap inside me, and they filled it with brashness and demands. They offered poor imitations of the real thing, and I was so desperate that I accepted, and called it dominance. I knew even then that it wasn’t quite what I needed, but something is better than nothing, right? …Right? I felt like I couldn’t go without it anymore. Now that I knew there was something missing, I couldn’t leave this empty space inside myself… and so I settled. Men used me, and I let them. I have to own my part in this journey because I allowed myself to accept less. We accept what we think we deserve, and I let myself believe that’s all there was, and it was all I was worth. I see quite often, on posts I write, and posts from others note that say ‘’does this even exist,” and to those asking themselves this very question… yes, it exists. Out there are real dominants. Ones who understand patience, and who know that what you need is more important than what they want. Don’t be like me, chasing the shiny things, and risk missing the real thing. pleasurewhore~  "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.” |
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Desperate need often leads to settling for than less than you want or need. It's a struggle for anyone that has a hole in their life that they want to fill. I certainly can say I've been there in the past. I actually was just thinking of "settling" this morning as I thought back over the basic futility of my search the last months. This post reminded me of the resolve I had at the beginning of my search NOT to settle for less than what I want. Thank you for the reminder. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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Praise for noting this wasn’t an original piece. The author ? As for preferring to be alone to settling, I can speak to this from my own experience of being alone for the past 20 years. A companion, even occasionally, can save one’s heart from the sand storms of a barren world. Be sure you understand what it is to be alone. 20 years is a long time to be on your own. I've been on my own for a few years. And as time passes, I get more particular about who I allow into my life. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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I've accepted less and have been embarrassed by that but it was all a learning experience. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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I've been reading your posts for awhile now, but I'm so impressed by this one. Pure poetry. I've always thought that the D/s interaction is like art, poetry, or music. The more we try to explain what it is, why it works, the more limiting and excluding that description becomes. The best we can do is to examine our interaction, our reaction, our emotional reaction, when we encounter it. Often a few words for a practitioner say more than volumes by experts.  "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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It is true that we accept the love we think we deserve, and it is a good thing if we have enough self-awareness and do know ourselves well, have self-respect,, and not only the injuries we lean on believing what someone convinced us that we don't deserve anything better... so we accept what we don't really feel like a complete thing. Sometimes it takes time, patience, and faith, but most importantly keeping up with your own needs and standards... I always believed that it is better to be alone, rather than with just anybody to fill the void or for the purpose of not being alone. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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Thank you very much for this precious post. It touched my soul so deeply and said clearly what I would never have been able to say. Thanks, belle "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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"We accept what we think we deserve", Yes always an issue in life. The past sometimes haunts us to believing things that may not be accurate. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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Men will always "take" what they want from you. . . but when you take time, look more closely, and explore more fully for just exactly what YOU want and need, then you will find . . Yes ..it does exist out there ! "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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The Real McCoy isn't shiny. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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Desperate need often leads to settling for than less than you want or need. It's a struggle for anyone that has a hole in their life that they want to fill. I certainly can say I've been there in the past. I actually was just thinking of "settling" this morning as I thought back over the basic futility of my search the last months. This post reminded me of the resolve I had at the beginning of my search NOT to settle for less than what I want. Thank you for the reminder.
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Praise for noting this wasn’t an original piece. The author ? As for preferring to be alone to settling, I can speak to this from my own experience of being alone for the past 20 years. A companion, even occasionally, can save one’s heart from the sand storms of a barren world. Be sure you understand what it is to be alone.
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I've accepted less and have been embarrassed by that but it was all a learning experience.
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4/2/2022 5:29 am |
I've been reading your posts for awhile now, but I'm so impressed by this one. Pure poetry. I've always thought that the D/s interaction is like art, poetry, or music. The more we try to explain what it is, why it works, the more limiting and excluding that description becomes. The best we can do is to examine our interaction, our reaction, our emotional reaction, when we encounter it. Often a few words for a practitioner say more than volumes by experts.
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It is true that we accept the love we think we deserve, and it is a good thing if we have enough self-awareness and do know ourselves well, have self-respect,, and not only the injuries we lean on believing what someone convinced us that we don't deserve anything better... so we accept what we don't really feel like a complete thing. Sometimes it takes time, patience, and faith, but most importantly keeping up with your own needs and standards... I always believed that it is better to be alone, rather than with just anybody to fill the void or for the purpose of not being alone.
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4/2/2022 4:26 am |
A hungry heart eats a lot of lies.
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Thank you very much for this precious post. It touched my soul so deeply and said clearly what I would never have been able to say. Thanks, belle
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I am not the author of this piece. I just thought it was a great conversation topic. Obviously, I was correct. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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As a general rule, something is not better than nothing. It always has complications that do not end well. As we age we learn this. I hear comments all the time about why it is I don't have a partner. My answer is I have not found one I feel I am not compromising my own best interests. Some may call that being picky..........so what, they are not living my life. "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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As a general rule, something is not better than nothing. It always has complications that do not end well. As we age we learn this. I hear comments all the time about why it is I don't have a partner. My answer is I have not found one I feel I am not compromising my own best interests. Some may call that being picky..........so what, they are not living my life. "One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"
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"We accept what we think we deserve", Yes always an issue in life. The past sometimes haunts us to believing things that may not be accurate.
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Men will always "take" what they want from you. . . but when you take time, look more closely, and explore more fully for just exactly what YOU want and need, then you will find . . Yes ..it does exist out there !
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The Real McCoy isn't shiny. Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.
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