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Wicked_Tongue 61M
301 posts
4/18/2021 2:39 am
What's your role?

So I have often struggled label myself in the BDSM world. I am a very sexual person, and those ppl who say that BDSM should be above sex, are missing out some fundamentals...

That said, I identified as a subbie at first but then realised that I was a better dom than the ppl whom I was subbing. When I met the woman I describe as me best ever playmate she "corrupted" and got into a couple of things I always regarded as hard limits, so I now know that the right person can blur any and all lines... Hence my Fetlife profile I chose Constantly Evolving as my role!

Alt gives 6 choices for your role... Dom, sub, switch, unsure, not applicable and prefer not say.

How many of you can truly select just one of those options??

Should we have a better set of choices, encompassing a wider range of personalities?

So - What's your role?
Sub
Dom
Switch
Changeable
Constantly Evolving
Sapiophile
Partner-centric
Pansexual
Something else (please give more detail in comments!)
Nothing in this list truly applies to me


Wicked_Tongue 61M
690 posts
4/18/2021 7:46 am

Interesting poll...


luvunmetwo 69M
16 posts
4/18/2021 9:08 am

all sub here


InderioMinx 54F  
19818 posts
4/18/2021 12:03 pm

I believe that there is no one hard and fast answer. I also believe that being D or s falls on a continuum and while one may identify a certain way, they may find someone they feel different with. One may identify as a D, but then they find the right partner where being s feels right, or visa versa. I leave room for that to naturally occur.

Ars longa, vita brevis - Art is long, life is short


lilwolfcub 63M
132 posts
4/18/2021 8:10 pm

i do like the poll and how you have it set up


looking4fat 72T

4/19/2021 4:49 am

i "self-identify" as a Sexually Subservient Cocksucking Trap who is looking for Big Old Hairy Bears to use me.
As time goes by, i find myself becoming more amenable to being lightly bound and/or mildly abused rather than just used.
i did take an on-line "kink test." And i posted the results in my profile and in my blog. But they include: 95% Degradee, 81% Submissive, 0% Dominant, and 0% Switch. So, based on those, my "role" should be fairly clear.

My "gurl name" is Kate Coxuker. It is who i am and what i do.


sletje1999 24F
132 posts
4/19/2021 4:52 am

Mostly sub but have been called an alpha sub by one master and he really loved it . And I definitely would not rule out being dom with the right partner but that didn't happen so far. So I think it's partner centric for me, with a leaning more towards the sub side.


iam4u2use 70M

4/19/2021 10:15 am

I'm a total bottom sub.


Sirforher2030 52M

4/19/2021 12:09 pm

Straight Dom M


bimom4taboo 53F
2040 posts
4/20/2021 4:46 am

with men always a sub/slave. women can be both depending on there needs


Wicked_Tongue 61M
690 posts
4/20/2021 7:34 am

To be honest, Bimom, I have heard that a lot from biwomen.... Sub to men domme (or both) to women!


drmgirl622 68F  
26010 posts
4/21/2021 2:49 pm

All sub here....


Wicked_Tongue 61M
690 posts
4/21/2021 10:24 pm

Lol.... lots of ppl here choosing to prove me wrong... Many more pure subs or doms than I ever thought,,,,

Maybe I'm just a contrarian...!


looking4fat 72T

4/22/2021 2:57 am

    Quoting Wicked_Tongue:
    Lol.... lots of ppl here choosing to prove me wrong... Many more pure subs or doms than I ever thought,,,,

    Maybe I'm just a contrarian...!
It is a VERY small "sample size." But what amazes me is that Doms outnumber subs. When i poke around this site, it always seems to me that there are lots of subs and never enough Doms.

My "gurl name" is Kate Coxuker. It is who i am and what i do.


slaveRam4MsM 42M
178 posts
4/22/2021 3:40 am

I was select only one - sub


Wicked_Tongue 61M
690 posts
4/22/2021 6:53 am

If there are way too many subs on this site, then why am I still single, and in a perpetual struggle to find someone with whom to share my life/music/movies/books/food/kinks/fetishes/perversions?


MujerdeNeggro 49F
1105 posts
4/22/2021 7:53 am

Sumisa, total y absolutamente

Y quizás un instante sirva para trazar el camino que me guíe hacia tus ojos.


slaveSeeker007 59M

4/22/2021 9:34 am

I believe a good Dom can take their sub to a level of submissiveness and service that allows them to reach deep down inside them to please without words being spoken.


1shylady 45F
6 posts
4/22/2021 12:08 pm

Sub.😃


Wicked_Tongue 61M
690 posts
4/22/2021 11:29 pm

Still not many ppl going for anything other than sub or dom...


looking4fat 72T

4/23/2021 3:42 am

    Quoting Wicked_Tongue:
    If there are way too many subs on this site, then why am I still single, and in a perpetual struggle to find someone with whom to share my life/music/movies/books/food/kinks/fetishes/perversions?
Maybe you are not "Dom-ish" enough to peak their interest.

Also, remember that, when compared to the general population of the world, the number of people active on this site is infinitesimal. The chances of finding the right person in your area is NOT good. i have been here for almost 6 years now and all i get are empty promises from fantasy Doms who just want to wank to my pics in the comfort of their own homes.

My "gurl name" is Kate Coxuker. It is who i am and what i do.


Wicked_Tongue replies on 4/23/2021 4:52 am:
I agree entirely Kate, but I realize this and so am more than willing to travel a reasonable distance. In the past I have travelled as far as Brighton (252 miles) to meet someone... But I have also talked to ppl whose idea of being willing to travel is a maximum of 30 miles.

I have zero unrealistic expectations, that's one reason why I won't cough up for a gold membership ever again!

EcuriousNNJ 67M
575 posts
4/23/2021 5:17 am

i'm just a subby!


buckard22 55M
41 posts
4/23/2021 9:18 am

sub , but i could see being dom , changeable


DragonTrucker69 55M

4/24/2021 11:21 am

I am most definitely a Dom. I am very assertive in everything I do. I’m noncommissioned officer in the US Army and have been for almost 20 years. So that gives me a certain assertive attitude. I was trained by a Mistress in Germany when I was stationed over there a long time ago. To train me she treated me as a sub so that I would know what I was doing felt like. From that point on I have never been a sub nor will I ever be again. But my current sub also says I am a sadist. I know many different ways to punish and different ways to torment her. For that reason I put constantly evolving. Because if you think about it we are all constantly evolving in our role, we are constantly learning new things, and developing new attitudes toward things.


aldompdx 62M
1074 posts
4/27/2021 2:33 am

BDSM Master and BDSM Slave are missing.
They typically denote a stronger level of dominance or submission. But I prefer the terms control and surrender. The master controls themself, and from honor and respect for that self control, the slave chooses to surrender to the path on which the master travels.

Via my handle ALDOMPDX, I communicate on the usual daught calm places.


Wicked_Tongue 61M
690 posts
4/27/2021 7:39 am

    Quoting  :

I find it so disheartening that wonderful subbies like you, Tee are struggling to fin a suitable dominant... I know you love to find a dom to control you, whom you could gladly serve...

And then I'm thousands of miles away struggling to find my suitable subbie!



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