Blog : How To Know Where YOU FIT IN .. Whats Your TYPE and STYLE?

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6/22/2019 9:23 am

How To Know Where YOU FIT IN .. Whats Your TYPE and STYLE?

INTRODUCTION to ..........
GROUPINGS TITLES ORIENTATIONS TYPES And STYLES

Groupings; Dominant / Switch / Submissive

Titles or Categories; Doms : Dommes / Tops ; Bottoms / subs slaves

Orientations; Hard _______ _ Moderate ________________ Soft

________________SM Pain Play_____ Sensual/ Sex Play/Romantic

Types of Specialization: Masters/Mistress Baby Girls Pets Whores

Not All Listed

Styles;______Sadist ______ Daddy ______ Pain Sluts______ 1950s Pin Ups

Note The Styles are Personal , Each Individual is allowed to shape their own persona.

Most Common Types and Styles of Dominants

The Collector Dominant. The Collector is focused on building a stable of submissives similar to a harem. For the Collector, quantity always trumps quality. In his way of thinking, the measure of a Dom’s standing is how many submissives he can accumulate, without much regard for who, or even what, those submissives may be. It is relatively common for a Collector Dom to attempt to collar a submissive mere minutes after meeting her for the first time in an online chat room or on a BDSM social network. Best match: The Novice Submissive / The Pseudo Submissive.

The Daddy or Mommy Dominant. Daddy & Mommy Doms find fulfillment in the relationship dynamic that exists between the Dominant and submissive, who is usually referred to as baby, babygirl, babyboy, little one, or other pet name that reinforces the sub’s -like status in the relationship. A Daddy or Mommy Dom craves a sub with the ability to trust absolutely, a spirit of wide-eyed innocence and playfulness, an eagerness for guidance, and no-holds-barred adoration. Best match: The Little Submissive / The Pet Submissive / The Brat Submissive.

The FemDom Mistress. The FemDom is always a dominant female who utilizes a unique combination of force and sexual role reversal. She may prefer either male or female submissives, and is sometimes referred to as a Domme, Domina, Dominatrix, or Mistress. A sub-category of FemDom is the FinDom, a contraction of Financial Dominant. There is often a significant element of misandry (hatred of men) which may be real or role-played involved in the FemDom Topping style. Best matches: The Painslut Submissive / The Cow-Pig Submissive.

The Gorean Slave Master. A Gorean Slave Master, almost by definition, is a male Dominant who prefers slaves to submissives and subscribes to a highly stylized, authoritarian, and ritualistic way of life described in John Norman’s science fiction novels about the planet Gor. Goreans typically believe that women are inferior to men and deserve to be enslaved. Gorean slaves are treated as property, have no rights, and cannot own property of their own. Best matches: The Kajira Slave / The Domestic Submissive.

The Ineffable Dominant. The Ineffable Dom is typically a Dominant who has been in the D/s lifestyle for several years or longer and has, mostly through trial and error, learned what does and doesn’t work best in his D/s relationships. He has consciously explored and borrowed traits and characteristics from the other Dominant categories. The synergy created with each new partner brings new facets to the Ineffable Dom’s unique (and sometimes indescribable) Topping style. Best matches: The Warrior Princess Submissive / The Acolyte Submissive.

The Lesser God Dominant. A Dominant who expects and thrives on the worship of his or her submissives. This adoration and worship, which can sometimes take the form of highly ritualistic activities and behaviors, has but one purpose, which is the ego gratification of the Lesser God. It is relatively common for the households of Lesser God Doms to forsake all traditional forms of religion in order to practice their own home-grown religion, with the Dom at its head and subs as followers. Best match: The Acolyte Submissive / The Domestic Submissive.

The Sadistic Dominant. A Dom who enjoys or becomes sexually aroused from inflicting physical or emotional pain or discomfort upon his partners. Whether or not his partner is a masochist (someone who enjoys pain) is usually irrelevant to the pleasure that a Sadistic Dom gets from inflicting it. There is a wide spectrum of sadism that can range from the minimally sadistic yet skilled pain-inflictor on one end, to the abusive or pathologically dangerous extreme sadist at the other end of the scale. Best match: The Painslut Submissive / The Cow-Pig Submissive.

The Tin Pot Dominant. The TPD is primarily a role player. He doesn’t consider what he does as a deception; he considers it role play. For him, D/s isn’t a lifestyle; it’s entertainment. He sees it as perfectly natural and appropriate behavior, mainly because he believes he is interacting with others who are doing precisely the same thing. Since he believes that everyone is simply making it up as they go along, he feels pretty confident in doing so himself. Best matches: The Pseudo Submissive / The Novice Submissive / The Brat Submissive.

The White Knight Dominant. The White Knight Dom wants to right wrongs, slay dragons, rescue subs in trouble, treat his submissive like a princess, and become King – and he wants to do it all before lunch. He is driven by a sense of chivalry and altruism that transcends what he considers to be the sordid and tawdry business of self-gratification. Making you happy makes him happy. The White Knight lives to find solutions to your problems, but the downside is, not all problems are fixable. Best matches: The Warrior Princess Submissive / The Acolyte Submissive.
The Bear Dominant. The Bear Dom is typically a burly gay or bisexual male Dominant who prefers diminutive and youthful gay or bisexual male submissives. Some Bear Doms are attracted to lady-boys and boyish females, as well. They are called Bear Doms mostly for their tendency to exhibit hyper-masculinity and somewhat exaggerated male characteristics such as a muscular or stocky build and abundant body hair. Bear Doms are commonly encountered in the BDSM leather and LGBT subcultures. Best match: The Painslut Submissive / The Little Submissive.

Most Common Types and Styles of Submissive’s.

The Acolyte Submissive. The Acolyte is a disciple, follower, worshipper or priestess, and considers herself a holder of sacred knowledge, a gatekeeper with the keys to her Dominant’s inner sanctum, and a part of a relationship that may transcend even death in a quasi-religious D/s relationship dynamic. In essence, the Lesser God Dominant and his Acolytes create their own private religion. Best matches: The Lesser God Dominant / The White Knight Dominant / The Ineffable Dominant
The Brat Submissive. The brat is a submissive who is generally well-behaved, but has made misbehavior, teasing, and limited kinds of defiance or disobedience an integral part of the D/s dynamic she enjoys with her Dominant, preferably with his full awareness and at least his implied approval. Without the requisite awareness and approval of her Dominant, the more appropriate classification would be the Pseudo-Sub. Best matches: The Daddy/Mommy Dominant / The Tin Pot Dominant
The Cow/Pig Submissive. The Cow or Pig submissive is one who enjoys being treated like a domesticated farm animal, and thrives on humiliation, degradation, and abuse from her Dominant. The relationship dynamic focuses on the real or imagined unattractiveness or worthlessness of the submissive. Cages, crates or pens are typically where the she is most comfortable. Best matches: The Sadistic Dominant / The Gorean Slave Master / The Femdom Mistress.
The Domestic Submissive. Sometimes referred to as a service submissive, she is expected to perform domestic duties such as cooking, cleaning, childcare, chauffeuring, and yard work. The Domestic sub is often expected to be sexually available to the Dominant, and sometimes to his other submissives, friends, or guests. Humiliation role play is quite often a significant part of their dynamic. Best matches: The Sadistic Dominant / The Lesser God Dominant / The FemDom Mistress.
The Kajira Sub/Slave. A female Gorean slave in the tradition of John Norman’s pulp science fiction novels about the planet Gor is referred to as a kajira (plural: kajirae). Kajirae, almost by definition, are typically involved in relationships with Gorean Masters, however it is fairly common to find submissives who have been previously trained as kajirae but are no longer in the Gorean sub-culture and are now involved with other types of Dominants. Even so, it is quite common for certain affectations of the Gorean training to persist. Best matches: The Gorean Slave Master / The Sadistic Dominant / The Ineffable Dominant.
The Little Submissive. A Little is a submissive who finds joy in embracing his or her inner . This dynamic often involves behaving, speaking, or dressing in a -like manner or engaging in typical -appropriate activities, and may or may not involve sex or other adult-appropriate themes and activities. While most Littles and their Mommy or Daddy Doms find age play to be sexually stimulating, there are also many who do not associate being a Little with sex at all. Best match: The Daddy-Mommy Dominant / The White Knight Dominant / The Ineffable Dominant.

The Novice Submissive. The Novice submissive is typically one who has very recently discovered and become excited about the D/s or BDSM lifestyle and has decided that she badly wants to be a part of it at any cost. Unfortunately, this often involves a frenzied and quite often very dangerous quest to find a Master – any Master – as soon as possible. This condition is often referred to as sub frenzy. The Novice submissive is easily spotted in a crowd as the sub who is lecturing anyone who will listen about her version of the “One Twue Way” to live the lifestyle. Best match: The Daddy-Mommy Dominant. Most common, but hardly the best match: The Tin Pot Dominant / The Collector Dominant.
The Painslut Submissive. The Painslut is usually an extreme masochist who enjoys or is aroused by sensations of intense or extreme pain. The Painslut’s primary interest is pain, pure and simple, and the inclusion of the suffix slut is not incidental. Painsluts are often known as much for their sexual promiscuity as they are for their extreme masochism, and they tend to gravitate toward the most sadistic Dominants. Best matches: The Sadistic Dominant / The FemDom Mistress / The Bear Dominant.
The Pet Submissive. A Pet submissive assumes the role of a cherished animal companion to her Dominant, who typically assumes the role of an owner, caretaker, trainer, breeder, or even rider. Pet submissives typically slip in and out of character as needed in order to deal with the more mundane and human aspects of their vanilla lives. The animal personas chosen by Pet submissives generally fall into three categories: kittens, puppies, and ponies. Many Pet Submissives will bristle at the notion that their pet personas are a manifestation of role playing. For many, it is an integral and primary personality characteristic that must be hidden from the vanilla world they have to live in. For those individuals, it is the vanilla façade that they must maintain in public that is the role play. Best matches: The Daddy-Mommy Dominant / The White Knight Dominant / The Ineffable Dominant / The Lesser God Dominant.
The Pseudo Submissive. The pseudo-sub is someone who may be fairly new to the lifestyle and doesn’t quite understand that just because she is a rope-bunny, spankophile, masochist, or bottom, that this doesn’t necessarily make her a submissive. She typically isn’t trying to deceive anyone; it’s all simply the unfortunate but predictable result of erroneously assuming that just because someone is a bottom, she must also be a submissive. The Pseudo-sub likes taking orders from her Dominant, as long as he tells her to do what she would be doing anyway. A pseudo-sub is never wrong. She’s just learning life lessons on her own, the hard way. The Pseudo-sub stands ever-ready to offer her Dominant advice on how to be a better partner. This usually consists of recognizing her bad moods and just not bugging her at those times. Best match: The Tin Pot Dominant / The Collector Dominant.

The Warrior Princess Submissive. She is the wicked-smart, strong-willed, uber-competent, ultra-competitive, synergistic, switchy, crusader. She’s no one’s doormat, never a victim. She is a kick-ass submissive for the 21st century. Think: Xena, the Warrior Princess, kneeling at the feet of Hercules. This definitely isn’t a woman in a precarious predicament waiting helplessly for her White Knight to arrive and slay a dragon for her. This was a woman who, as she is kicking the dragon’s ass, smiles at the White Knight standing on the sidelines and says, “Hey, buddy! Feel free to jump right in and lend your sword to this fight. Otherwise, stay the hell out of my way!” The Warrior Princess doesn’t need or want a rescuer. The Warrior Princess needs an ally that she can rely upon in the chaos of battle. She seeks a warrior equal to the tasks that she has already chosen for herself, and is demonstrably capable of accomplishing with, or without, his help. She is willing and able to fight the good fight alone, but welcomes the notion of having a worthy partner, fighting by her side. And yet, when the day’s fighting is done, she is perfectly at ease with considering herself entirely His – heart, might, mind, body, and soul. She is important because she just may be the hope and salvation of this lifestyle. There will come a day, in the not too distant future, when the Warrior Princess Submissive will be forced to become a combatant in a highly politicized war on the BDSM lifestyle. It will be a propaganda war that characterizes all Dominants as abusers and all submissives as victims of abusive and exploitative relationships. When she comes out of the shadows and chooses to fight for this lifestyle instead of against it – as many of her contemporaries will expect her to do – her strong moral compass will reassure those on the sidelines that she is doing what is right and just. Best matches: The Ineffable
The “Tame Me” Submissive – The “tame me” type of submissive is overly rebellious, overly strong-willed and overly confrontational with dominant types. They want to find, in their own words, a strong dominant to break their spirit and make them be the submissives these girls just know they can be. This type of submissive doesn’t seem to realize that most dominants enjoy a spirited submissives and don’t actually want to attempt to train a wild pony only to have it turn into a old gray mare once they saddle-breaking phase is completed. A submissive that shows qualities of rebellion, will and spirit are often looked upon appreciatively by dominants, but the tame me type of submissives tend to take these traits to the next level. Ordinarily, once a tame me type is actually tamed, she becomes bored with her relationship and begins looking anew for better challenges. These submissives do not often form lasting relationships within a BDSM community. A positive thing about the tame me type of submissive is that they are really fun for the first couple of months, but after they have been tamed, they tend to settle into predictable ruts until they are ready to leave the relationship, then they will begin to act out again in hopes that someone, who is not their current partner, will attempt to tame them once again.. Psychologically speaking, one wonders is a tame me type is merely playing hard to get in order to find a partner that will put up with them and not become overly baffled when the submissive ceases to be a challenge and then leaves for another person that will do it all over again.

The “SAM” Submissive – A “SAM” type submissive, also known as a Smart-Assed Masochist, is just that, a smart-talking submissive with a quick tongue. These submissives are usually only SAMs, or Sammie, to their partners or people they know very well. Usually, their Sammie behavior isn’t actually a cry for attention; it’s just their way of being playful. In fact, most SAMs when actually threatened with punishment will back off, saying that they were only playing and that they didn’t mean anything by it. Occasionally, this behavior can be incredibly frustrating to their partners who, by the time the SAM has agitated their partner into frenzy, are looking to string the SAM submissive up by their toes and see how many fresh red marks can be created. Interestingly enough, most SAM submissives are not actually masochists. They actually do not want to be punished for their actions as, to them; they were just playing around to begin with. The positive thing about a SAM sub is that they are usually great fun and very playful partners. Occasionally, they are playful to an infuriating level and will occasionally push their partners until their partners are ready to torture them just to relieve the stress. Psychologically speaking, a SAM is probably not actually looking for punishment or attention, but just wants to show their affection by acting the way they do. The SAM is usually subdued by a couple of harsh words, because once they realize they have stopped being fun, they do not enjoy the feeling associated with causing their partner actual distress.
The “Brat” – The “brat” is different from the tame me type and the SAM type in the fact that they are overly-aggressive, smart-mouthed and frequently rude, they have no intentions of submitting to anyone’s authority or discipline, except that of their partner. This fact, however, does not stop the brat from continuously harassing every dominant and most submissives with which she comes into contact. Oddly enough, to their partners, brats are, almost unanimously, not bratty. The brat knows full well that their partner can and will punish them, and probably would if their partner caught them acting the way they do in a community. Brats are usually very good submissives once they find a partner, but their confidence in knowing full well that they have a partner and no one else can lay a finger on them typically causes their behavior. Anyone that’s ever fallen victim to the behavior of the brat can usually stop the brat’s behavior toward them with a well-worded email to the brat’s partner, along with any specific bratty remarks copied and pasted into the text of the mail. The good thing about brats is that they are, almost unanimously, actually very good submissive. They usually behave very well to their partners and are usually very easy to get along with in relationships. Psychologically speaking the brat probably acts the way she does, because of the sense of security afforded to her by the knowledge that she has a partner and no one else is allowed to touch her. The brat, once reported to their partners for their behavior, tend to settle down and treat the person that has reported them quite respectfully. The brat will normally only push the people she knows she can push.

The “True” Submissive – The “true” submissive is often the culmination of the desires of every dominant figure around this person. The “true” submissive is often shy, under spoken, docile, servile and absolutely willing to do anything asked of her. The true submissive is usually aware first of the wants, needs and expectations of the dominant figures around her and not concerned as much with her own wants, needs and expectations. The true submissive is frequently inexperienced, untaught and looking to be pleasing by being perceived as the ‘expected’ norm that a submissive should be. The true submissive will serve anyone and allow herself to be disciplined by anyone claiming to be dominant. The true submissive will usually be found off to the side and out of the way of everyone, rather than openly interacting with people. The good thing about the “true” submissive is that they can be educated and trained out of these types of behavior. Through training and education, these submissives often find that they are allowed to say no to people. They find out that they can get involved in conversations and don’t have to be wallflowers in social situations. They also find out that they are allowed to want, need and expect things as any other person would. All they need is some encouragement. Psychologically speaking, there’s nothing at all wrong with the “true” type submissive, other than they need some guidance and that they probably got some bad advice from an online dominant or an online submissive. With good advice and guidance, these submissives can easily turn out to be fine submissives, or they can turn into one of the other six types mentioned here.
There are also, of course, the “normal” submissives that enjoy carrying on conversations, are very openly opinionated and very capable of handling themselves in social situations. It is to these kinds of submissives that others would do well to look to as role models and advice-givers.


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