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Put it in Writing...! Contracts are what come to mind when we think of written agreements. We see them as extremely important and useful documents which possess great legal weight.... So why not legitimize your D/s relationship by drafting and signing a contract that covers most of the angles......in the interest of clarity and avoiding confusion. You set expectations and goals and the means to achieve them in a contract. It clarifies the extent of the dom’s power over the sub. On the other hand, it can also stipulate what the sub is willing to do and what lines should never be crossed. Determining the soft and hard limits within a power exchange relationship can be tricky for beginners. A lot can be lost in a verbal agreement. Putting everything on actual paper will most likely eliminate the confusion regarding who gets to do what. They re sort of relationship guard. They’re symbolic of the expanse and authority of the power exchange and not merely a noted-down articulation of its logistics. Your dedication to the kink reaches such incredible heights that you just have to put it in writing. It adds a bit more flavor to the experience, imparting more legitimacy to your dom/sub dynamic. Have in mind that D/s contract or agreement is not limited to TPE, you can make it flexible on any level and any condition you seem comfortable with, You can be as vague or specific as you see fit, and can always re-visit and amend as you explore. Always play safe...  |
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8/29/2023 12:12 pm |
Great post. A contract signing is also the great basis for a ceremony at your local club or dungeon.
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 Slave rick
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8/29/2023 2:18 pm |
Great in theory, Bad in practice. Just remember anything you say and do can be used against you in a court of law. Anything in writing can be seen by current and future employers on the internet. Writing can be an undeniably effective form of communication, but it can also be effectively undeniable.
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A good idea, although I've never seen one
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It is my belief that a SAFEWORD should be the only (rock-bottom/last resort) imperative in a D/s and B&D dynamic or interaction., which, MUST include, of course, the option of a substitutional vigorous negational headshake by a partner, should he/she be bound and gagged at the time, but nevertheless, wishing adamantly to express his/her demurral to giving participatory assent to a particularly/excessively abusive, offensive, dangerous, or unhealthy activity or practice. Written and signed contracts are, to my mind, toothlessly symbolic, as, I am fairly certain, they would carry no weight or validity in a court of law, unlike, for example, a prenuptial agreement or a business contract. Despite opinions to the contrary, D/s play or relationships (even the Dady/Daughter or Mistress/cuckold variant) cannot be considered a business arrangement or closed deal, notwithstanding the frequent tribute transfers, which are best kept a private matter between the partners (so as not to run afoul of anti-prostitution laws and related personal stigmatization.) It is my further belief, as a male sub of roleplay preference, that a predetermined contract would all but kill any sense-- or not leave any modicum-- of that aspect or element of roleplay--largely theatrical, between partners of assumed personas-- that I would call excitingly/refreshingly/dramatically/suspensefully unexpected, unrehearsed, unfamiliar, innovative, resourcefully creative, spontaneous, extemporaneous, and ad hoc., which I feel are devoutly to be wished in roleplay scenarios, and which are the furthest things from ritualized, by-the-numders, by-the-book, predictable, anticipated, and expected "training" exercises, which mostly define a non roleplay D/s dynamic, and which,though it might not be MY preferred cup of tea, is perfectly acceptable as the personal favorite type of play of many, if not the majority, of other respectable. knowledgeable, and caring D/s .and BDSM players/participants/afficionados. These comments represent only MY expressed personal OPINION. I actually have a copy of a slave contract that was presented to me some time ago by a Domme, which I never agreed to sign. I found it oppressively restrictive, cloyingly limiting, freedom-denying, and privacy-invasive.; in short, as just another form of rule-driven red-tape overkill and "political correctness." I was afraid of relenting (and signing) and thus allowing the prospect of my (hopefully) imminent D/s play date to become .too overly characterized by a feeling of walking on eggshells, of overthinking (and its produced anciety) that eclipsed action-- basically, no fun at all.
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Yeah, contracts. Well, what i have heard, it is a fetish, to some. It has only value for the people involved. has not legal status. although a s type can use it against a d type, when she wants to, in court, that is, that can ruin your whole carriere/ life. Because, most court cases dont agree with the safe, sane and consensual thing... When you are in a relation, to-gether, you talk, At least, that is my idea, not put, god knows what, in writing. You can not put everything in writing, just to be on the safe side. Life throws curve balls everytime, you can not cover that in any kind of contract. You just have to go with the flow of things. YMMV, You do you.
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