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Born a This was suggested as a way communicate, since I have been effectively silenced here. Anyway just had a big breakthrough in therapy. It turns that Dad wasn't first time a man had r***d me. I had suppressed this memory and as of last week I remember everything. I was reaaaally young and was lured into a mans apartment walking home from . He was old (maybe in his 60s...I thought every adult was old). He was friendly and showed me some toys he collected (real toys not sex toys). He asked me to sit down then he left a few minutes. On his coffee table were hardcore porn magazines...lots of them. I think he waited me to pick one of them up before he came back in the room, because I did open one of them. I don't remember the words that were said but he started talking to me about how beautiful it was and if I had questions. Sex never entered mind in life nor did I have any sexual feelings about anything up to that . He started showing me some of his favorites, most of which were hardcore penetration of a young small woman and an older man... and asked if I wanted to feel what it is like. I was scared but I didn't think he would let me leave so I said yes. He unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock which was hard. He told me I should try kissing it and pushed it close to mouth. I was so scared I kissed it...then he told me to lick it, which led to him putting his cock between lips. He said I should start to suck it, just like the girls in the magazines, so I did. He was naked before I knew what was going on, still pushing his cock in mouth. I was gagging choking then I felt shirt being taken off, then was pulled up and he took the rest of clothes off. He pulled me in and started kissing me , hard while moaning, forcing his sloppy tongue all over mouth and down throat, violating mouth...I just let him...I was terrified, his hands all over body running his tongue over neck and chest. He was saying things and moaning all sorts of sounds. Then he told me to get on hands and knees. I remember that so clearly...and he got behind me. I felt something wet being poured onto anus (im sure it was lube) his hands all over ass and body. He forced his tongue inside mouth again then I felt his cock begin to enter me . It felt like a baseball bat was being forced into body. I screamed in pain as he pushed most of his shaft into small body then he pulled out and pushed inside me again. He did that over and over again, his full length thrusting, feeling like it was hitting ribcage. He may have thought screams were pleasure, because he increased his speed with full thrusts of his cock inside me . All I could do is grunt while he seemed do this what seemed like would never end. Then all I recall after that was his hands all over me and the sound of his slapping skin against me as he fucked me licking back, pulling hair, grunting and groaning with his vicious pleasure. He came inside me, because when he finally pulled out his spilled out of body like a faucet. I thought it was blood. He kissed me again, told me to get dressed...I was paralyzed and in pain but I did, underwear soaking up the that was all over ass. Finally I was going to be able to leave and he gave me a model car kit as a gift (of all things that was truly weird) and said that I should visit again tomorrow. I got out of there and ran home. I got in the shower and tried to pull his out of body...then...somehow...I don't know...pretended it didn't happen. Never went back. I did not remember any of that until last week. It explains a lot about why I am a nymphomaniac and have sex with literally anything with a pulse, why I have a r**e fetish, maybe why favorite position is doggie, why about a year after that happened I started doing strange but overtly sexual things, and literally every moment I am thinking about what happened so many decades ago and just cannot believe that remembering that trauma makes me disgustingly horny. This was something that happened to me and me alone, and I do not wish this scenario to happen to any person or their loved ones. This is purely own personal and experience, traumatizing as it was, It appears to have set me in directions I never would have gone had it not happened, good or ill it is part of who I am now, and I am thankful that I remember. |
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So that started you on the correct path of pleasing men
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I went crazy after that...took about a year but then started doing abnormal sexual things. You could say that this was what started my fire
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Well, we can thank that man for starting you off right
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I never knew his name, and Im sure he has passed away by now. I never said a word about it, but remembering this has brought all sorts of emotions to me. I love who I became, and despite the foul things he did to me at the time, it turned me into who I am...a whore, a cock slut, a submissive bitch, a nympho, a bdsm toy, a depraved sexual creature that will do anything sexual with anybody or anything...and I embrace it
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Frankly I should have gone back the next day, and every day after that, swallowed his cum, be destroyed by his cock....Ive made up for that regret since then, but im so sad I didn't let him get another chance at me
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He should have been on the look out for you every day, used you every day
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I think he saw me for a very long time before he decided to "invite" me to his apartment. I walked the same way after school every day. This wasn't a random thing, he had it planned.
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I would love to "invite" you into my house but you never seem to walk by 
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Oh you know I would have let you r**e me, over and over again
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That sounds fun. I would love to see you in action
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I have cum so many times remembering what happened...omg...I would hope it wouldn't just be watching, honey. You can BE the action
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You bet I want more that watching, I want to use you hard, abuse your whore body and have my fun using you
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I know this, you KNOW I know this, you know I want it, and even if I didn't, I would let you inside me. I love aggressive men, really aggressive. My body is physically designed to give men pleasure. I do not have a say in how I am to be used, since childhood I am a piece of meat for men to cum on and in, and I love and savor every fing moment I can give a man an orgasm
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You are a nasty little cunt who deserves to be used. Your goal should to be to service at least 1 cock a day and more if you can get them. I would love to get your nipples all pumped up and put some clamps on them...and then start adding weight
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oh fuck
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If you do not whimper too much as I am adding the weights and after we reach your limit, I will take off some of the weight, put you on all fours and fuck your ass hard so the the weights on your nipples will swing freely
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ill fucking do whatever you say. I should have let that man fuck me over and over again. Gone back next day, letting him fuck me hard and deep. I didn't, and I am ashamed I didn't. He would have r**ped me for weeks or months and I did not go back. My fear overwhelmed me, I truly wish I could go back and let him push his cock inside me, plow me relentlessly and use me like a bitch.
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Well, you may have missed out on that man fucking day after day but I bet you have made up for that mistake ever since then. How old were you when you started getting used on a regular basis
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3 or 4 years older. My dad started with me then, which led to many other men, some of which he arranged
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I guess with your Dad and the men that he arranged for you were all older than you. When did you start choosing men for yourself and did you choose older guys, around your own age or maybe younger guys
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I was probably 16 when I independently started flirting with men and trying to get them to have sex with me. They were all very much older than myself. I am attracted to older men always. Have had sex with young men and women, but always lean towards much older men
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Glad to hear that you like older men. Do you enoy them because they will take control of you and make you do what they want for fun? I love to abuse nasty little cunts like you. I am sure you have been fisted before but I would love to tie you up and make you take my fist
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It seems to be a matter of power and authority. Doing what they have told me to do is part of that. I have an unnatural loyalty and submission to older men, and have done disgusting things for them. My instinct is to arch my back and raise my ass and wait for you to fist me to your forearm
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Sounds like you are a good (and by that I mean nasty perverted and kinky) little girl who obeys her elders. Are you going to be used this weekend. Do couples ever use you
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Couples use me all the time (and I use them  ) I had a hot experience at a Halloween party Thursday, but this weekend it is up in the air
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