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What Is This Fuckery We Speak Of?  mind·fuck /ˈmīndˌfək/ noun: mind fuck a disturbing or extremely confusing experience, in particular one that is caused by deliberate psychological manipulation. An idea or concept that shakes one's previously held beliefs or assumptions about the nature of reality.. Mind Fuck is a term we use with endearment and equal frustration within the lifestyle. I had come t.o an opinion that there are those Dominants that are defined by their fetish with mind fucking and there are also those that try their damnedest not t.o appear t.o be. The mind fuck is intrinsic to the dance we d.o as Dominant and submissive. That is not t.o say the fuckery of her mind is always healthy for her or pleasurable. Again this is the responsibility of a Dominant, t.o carefully examine his thought processes. Is he doing this fuckery for her benefit and how will she be when he finishes it? The submissive’s mind is completely focused o.n the goal, her pleasure that you have been denying her and that she desperately desires. She will be working so hard t.o accomplish her goal that she will not even realize how unrealistic the situation really is..This is where the trick of setting her u.p to fail can be implemented t.o have negative or positive results. This will of course be the Dominant responsibility t.o make sure and follow through. The submissive's Sir listens and watches closely for what sets the sub mind off into a desirable state. The Dominant is always required to monitor his submissive’s mindset and have a solid understanding of where her head is at. Does she have any triggers? Are you causing trauma or a healing experience?To be honest “triggers” are identified and understood with time and experience. You will begin to recognize situations such as spiraling and lack of submissive mindset as you continue along your journey. The most important lesson in this post to a new Dominant would be that the Dominant needs to realize that it is his responsibility, and only his, to maintain a healthy D/s atmosphere for himself and his submissive. If his submissive’s behavior is unsatisfactory, he should be looking at his own leadership for the answers. What should he be doing or not doing? Often times the submissive maintains her own submissive mindset to get the D/s relationship off the ground. Once airborne the submissive should pull back and the Dominant needs to take over. No matter what is happening, whether it be spiraling or brattiness, it is caused by the actions of the leader. He must recognize it and correct it. Basically, Man U.p ! Be what you claim t.o be and treat her with love and discipline without scarring her psyche along the way. Arathorne's Rule "Honor each Trust that is placed in you Know that you control with a human being, a living creature with needs and desires, strengths, fears and frailties. Do not dare t.o present yourself in any light other than that of truth. Never lose sight of your responsibility in this. Live in the awareness that you exercise control over another person's life; not a "lesser" person's life, an "other" person's life. If you would call yourself "Master" before anyone else confers this upon you, you are either a fool or a thief.. Or both. A fool in that you mistake the echo of your emptiness for resonance. A thief in that you take a piece of life from those around you, unearned, and are both unwilling and unable return it. It is a powerful thing that we do. A beautiful thing when done well." Song for this post Weak and Powerless - Perfect Circle |
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Weak and Powerless A Perfect Circle Tilling my own grave to keep me level Jam another dragon down the hole Digging to the rhythm and the echo of a solitary siren One that pushes me along and leaves me so Desperate and ravenous I'm so weak and powerless over you Someone feed the monkey while I dig in search of China White as Dracula as I approach the bottom Desperate and ravenous So weak and powerless over you Little angel go away Come again some other day The devil has my ear today I'll never hear a word you say He promised I would find a little solace And some peace of mind Whatever, just as long as I don't feel so Desperate and ravenous I'm so weak and powerless over you Desperate and ravenous So weak and powerless over you
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A very interesting read 
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So, the submissive knows where he or she wants to go. The Dominant, to get the keys to the car must show they know how to drive as well as how best to get there. Got it.
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I love giving a nice Mind fuck. Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.
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poetess Thank you for a very informative post that all in the Life-Style should read... A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw Jenny
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So, the submissive knows where he or she wants to go. The Dominant, to get the keys to the car must show they know how to drive as well as how best to get there. Got it.
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poetess Thank you for a very informative post that all in the Life-Style should read...
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A very interesting read
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I love giving a nice Mind fuck.
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5/5/2020 11:06 am |
Thanks for sharing
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Thanks for sharing
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And I love this answer more than any other  Yes, so few get that you can be positive in a Dominant role. It does not always have to be negative. They may even get it, but they cannot stop their own character flaws from getting in the way. No one is perfect by any means, but as a Dom, itis your job to guide it back to positive.
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5/7/2020 3:59 pm |
As a newbie I appreciate your insightful and clearly experienced view of the responsibilities that should be part of a M/s relationship. I agree that the Dom has to recognize the responsibility they have been given by someone that gives away their power and is completely vulnerable. If done properly I suspect it is an extremely emotional experience that is personally defining for both or more if several are involved. Thanks
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Made interesting reading. Thank You
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6/28/2020 5:43 am |
Herein is the dividing line that is a function of both experience in general and experience in situ. By "in situ" in this case, I am referring to the circumstance and level of the relationship. Specific knowledge and appropriate understanding is highly contingent upon that and this is all a matter of negotiation. For a a scene in which the connection is impromptu or between a recently connected pair, this means that the potential for safe mind fuckery is limited. You can ask many, many questions and still not be spot on. Observation and extended comprehension is required. Hence, longer term or multiple occasion relationships have an upper hand and typically will yield more intense play that can successfully ride the razors edge. Particularly as a result of verbal play outside a scene in order to establish the nuances of reactions in a safe venue.
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Very true. Doms have to be aware of the submissive going in different direction he desires. This will make stay very attentive to my subs needs. Thank you!
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