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Responding To An Unsolicited Penis Portrait This post is only viewable by Alternative Lifestyle Singles members. Join Alternative Lifestyle Singles now! |
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Yah, butt it made U Smile!!
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Funny and true but why do women assume that I want to see their gynecology exam photos?
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Ooooooo👄Hilarious!!!☺️.... And if I may add this "observation" some of you guys around don't even realize that you have god-awful looking dicks 😳EEEEEK😵
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This was an eloquent and witty retort!  There was a similar retort here in the blogs posted earlier this month ... I am 110% sure it will put a smile on your face. I apologize to the blogger for stealing their material, but I don't think they'll mind.Hello stranger, I see from the unsolicited picture you sent that you have a big cock. You’re obviously very impressed with it; so much so that you felt you simply *had* to share it with a woman you’ve never met! Oh…it’s…it’s not just me? You show it off to every woman you message? I see. Just out of curiosity – how’s that been working out for you? Do you get a lot of responses? Are the majority of women falling all over themselves, clamoring for a chance to climb your cock like squirrels up a tree? Or are the majority replying with varying forms of “fuck off”? Are you simply a very confused emotional masochist? By that I mean, do you purposely engage in inappropriate behavior on a social media platform, with the goal being “verbal” (i.e., written) humiliation and degradation by anonymous women? Do you realize there are literally thousands of women who would humiliate and degrade you live and in person, if you could just keep your pet snake tucked away until she asked to see it? Maybe you’re not a confused, emotional masochist…maybe you’re King Cock. Oh lord…I’ve met you and pretty much every single version of yourself you’ve ever invented. All hail the King…no, seriously. I want to rain down stones upon your head. Both your heads. For you, I have a couple of legitimate questions. First, how the hell did you come to the conclusion that having a big dick and being “dominate” were synonymous? Second, did you know that if your partner was actually turned on and adequately aroused, even your big dick probably wouldn’t give her much pause when you slid it inside? Oh, I know...All your partners have told you how much your “Big Daddy Dick” hurts…News flash, your Majesty, even a small cock hurts like hell when it’s being rammed into a cunt that’s as dry as the Mojave. A big dick doesn’t make you dominant or make you a great lay. You’ve used “Big Cock” status to skate through your entire sexual life, under the mistaken impression that bringing a fat prick to the party was more than adequate and you didn’t need to do anything else…just lay back and cum. Welcome to the grown-up world, kiddo. Big dicks are a dime a dozen and I can go get one that never gets soft, vibrates, and actually knows where my clit is…and it’s sparkly and neon pink. Your big dick is officially replaceable. All joking aside - I’m not a size queen and I never have been. Telling me about your massive cock is actually the number one thing you can do to make me immediately lose interest. If your best personality trait is swinging between your legs, you’ve got a whole host of issues I don’t wanna touch with a 10-foot pole and someone else’s hand. In my experience there are 2 types of Big Dick Dudes: 1. Little Dicky Dickerson from Dickmenot Lane – Great big dick hanging from a small-minded, angry, egotistical, narcissistic asshole. This dude is a walking red flag, not just for kink, but for any type of vanilla relationship, too. Google search “gaslighting bastard” and his picture will probably pop up. He’s watched more than enough porn to know that having a big dick means he’s vastly superior to all other men and that women are supposed to fall to their knees and worship him, and he’s completely baffled as to why this isn’t happening. This jackass is one consent violation away from a prison sentence and will most likely never understand why his big dick didn’t win him any favors with the judge. 2. John Smith – unassuming, down to earth, generally a nice guy. He could literally be anyone…the super funny guy at work, the hot instructor at your gym, a smart-assed, tattooed bartender you’ve been eyeing *forever*…the point is, his dick is *NEVER* a topic of conversation, even on a place like this. He might be a sub, switch, dom, primal, whatever…he still doesn’t use his dick to try and get attention. He’s only going to bring up the size of his cock if he’s planning to fuck you and had trouble getting 2 fingers inside your pussy and that’s just to help you mentally prepare for the amount of work he’s about to put into prepping your cunt to accommodate his size. He doesn’t need to brag…his partners are happy to do it for him. Dicks, or really sex in general, is like anything else in life – the people who talk the loudest about how amazing they are, tend to be the ones I do my best to avoid. No one who’s “that good” has to sing their own praises. Is this priceless or what? Make Women Female Again
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You realize that you're insulting those of us raised by wolves?
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I was loving this blog but when I read "a rough guide to pants" I laughed so hard my drink was running out my nose  
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I have never and will never post a photo of my Penis. Might be easier if these guys posted photos of a Snickers Candy bar in its wrapper. At least the Candy has a chance to satisfy. And for fun of it, look up on the video tube a clip from the movie Groove Tube: Safety Sam "One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"
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Ok, I loved this, as well as the sample Plz posted. I may have to remember some of this, for future reference.  Ars longa, vita brevis - Art is long, life is short  
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I'll show it to you if you show me 🤣 Did you also play this when you were very young? Some have grown old, but not grown up... With today's technical possibilities, this can still be an attractive game, of course only with your approval!
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Lmao!…ouch! what a dushebag Ex sadly there are too many others just like him giving me a bad rep! lol be safe have a wonderful week Ex big hug gorgeous!
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This is funny.. I enjoyed reading it very much.. Smart woman who wrote it as well!
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