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MOCHAToy 30F
44 posts
2/17/2024 2:53 pm
When too much is not enough


I met a sadistic women this month at an event. I guess you can say her mistik captured my attention and kept me like a puppy dog, sniffing and viang to know more. Not sure if being aloof was just her method or her way of saying girl you trying to bite off more than you can chew. Nonetheless, I got what I wanted, which was her time and attention. We hit it off very well and I learned that she enjoyed hard core fetishes and kinks that scared me. Not as a result of bad experiences but society norms said so. I find so many lifestyle fetishes that we avoid because someone at some point said "we should."

Our friendship or should I say, our acquaintance went back and forth to different levels, personally and sexually. I knew or should I say I wanted this woman to fuck me, used me hard and have her way with me. All the extreme or hard core fetishes that appeals to her, excited me in a carnal way. It scared me and excited me at the same time. That's an addictive drug for me mentally. I didn't fear her as a person but, I feared myself. That I was wanting something that I should avoid or keep a distance from. I wanted to be bad, naughty, riskey, her pain slut and temp her to want to hurt and enjoy me in sexual ways. I'm not a pain slut but the emotional and sexual high that I receive when I've been pushed or used hard says differently and that scares and excites me. Everyone with a crop or paddle is not sadistic or mature enjoy to master such experiences. I gave myself to her and the tears, welps, marks, the use and abuse was too much for my mind and body but she knew I wanted or needed to be pushed further. She fucked and used every part of my body like I never imagined. My orgasms, tears and screams excited her. That was an enormous turn on for me and kept my body begging for more.

How many people want or need to be pushed further but don't know how to ask for it? Or even worst, don't have a relationship with someone who is experienced or trustworthy to take you to such depths. Debauchery, and degradation are not the same to every person. Nor is is required for the pleasure and exploration by sadistic individuals. My woman friend is an experienced jewel in her own right. I was the naughty brat who stuck my head in the noose and she gladly tightened the rope. Fetishes and kinks are fluid. If you explore or experiment, you will want or need to go further. I'm the type of person who need to be pushed beyond my stated limits. For internal reasons, I have lied to maintain a degree of safety but I wanted it more intense, harder and even ruthless. This way of thinking excites and scares me for some reason.


Xplorer15 62M/59F
592 posts
2/17/2024 3:37 pm

It's interesting to read how you're such a naughty brat.


DancingDom 74M
22590 posts
2/17/2024 4:13 pm

Enjoy your journey. But don't be afraid to call a halt when and if it gets too much for you.

"One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"


playfullness 71M/72F
72 posts
2/17/2024 4:59 pm

Thank you for sharing.

Do you think you're ready for MORE?


IsoOnlineSub7 65M/56F
1548 posts
2/17/2024 5:37 pm

I do love the "d" words. Debauchery, degradation, debasement, depravity. delightful.


ianmidwest 69M  
214 posts
2/17/2024 7:50 pm

what a lovely blog, honesty on how you really felt.
I always want to be pushed further but also a bit scared on how it would happen.
Enjoy your wonderful journey


Divya35 35F
1 post
2/18/2024 12:10 am

Well written self experience... similar to my situation... but I am on ignore mode after being used thoroughly for her pleasure. Hope to have someone genuine connection... missing funn here.


Arkangel_Fire 57M
1089 posts
3/4/2024 10:24 pm

Just keep moving forward and experiment...


leslie2022 24F  
8 posts
3/12/2024 5:51 pm

J'ai pris beaucoup de plaisir a vous lire MOCHA car la meme frenesie de me donner ou de vendre mon corps à un dominant sadique pour qu'il prenne plaisir à me torturer equivaut à me jeter dans la quete du plaisir, plaisir donné et reçu surtout si je le paie cher de ma peau , c'est un peu comme une mouche qui batifole avec les flammes.


MOCHAToy replies on 3/20/2024 11:22 am:
Merci Leslie2022. Les expériences enrichissantes changent parfois la vie.


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