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Long Distance Dominance and submission. Article in comments  |
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Long Distance relationships are a large part of the Community. We can’t always find our right partner close at hand. But Long Distance presents its own unique set of difficulties to a relationship beyond the distance. Obviously, there is no physical contact unless you can afford to visit. So much of BDSM relationships is usually physical. From scene play, to aftercare, to just cuddling or shopping together. Honesty and trust come more to the forefront. But there are ways to fulfil and strengthen the relationship even Long Distance. Communication is the imperative, along with Honesty and trust. From phone calls, to texting, to video chats, the more communication and the more ways you use it, make things easier. Hearing the voice of your partner is a treat, but not all times of the day are convenient for talking aloud. Texting can be done quickly and privately to keep in touch throughout the day, for updates, praise and affection. Video chats might need to be scheduled when both partners are free from daily responsibilities, but seeing your partner is always a huge lift to the spirits. As with any BDSM relationship, there needs to be structure and protocols. From the simple use of titles to the more controlling, letting the Dominant know when you leave the home, go to work, where your destination is, when you get home, back to the simple Goodnight message before bed. These protocols aren’t about controlling the life of the submissive as much as a reminder of the Dom/sub dynamic that would naturally be in evidence in a live-in situation. Smart toys are a bit expensive, but can add enjoyment and control to the relationship. They can also add to the thrill of a simple phone call, text message or video chat. Protocol about chastity, orgasm control and permission to play or orgasm can be used to exert Dominance and give submission. “Homework” or tasks can be used, both as a show of Dominance and as discipline. From learning to walk gracefully in high heels, or HIGHER heels, to researching a new kink to try, pricing new toys for a wish list or possible reward. Writing lines to essays as discipline for errs in protocol. I can guarantee a submissive will be overjoyed to receive unexpected gifts from their Dominant, and a dominant will welcome anything the submissive send as well. Aftercare is just as important Long Distance as in person. After any remote play or stressing task or discipline, you may not be able to cuddle, but Communicating, talking out what transpired is just as important to learn and grow together. What you do in a Long Distance relationship, is up to your imagination and continued Communication. The only limitations in Communication is not disrupting job related activities, so knowledge of what each partner is doing each day is vital. Lastly, like any relationship, you must get what you need out of it. Whether it is attention, controls, strictness, affection or any other need. Don’t settle for less. You deserve what you are looking for, just as in any other relationship. Communicate your needs, and strive to solve any problems, but don’t just take whatever you get. It is still a give and take relationship that has to work for both partners.
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Thank you Sir for putting it out here.
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Nice article and I appreciate you bringing up this topic. I like your approach. I think imagination is key, and communication is foundational. But I've noticed that the biggest challenge I have found is commitment. It is very hard to take people seriously when one is taken for granted and not seriously enough. The long-distance D/s relationships based on cyber play can be tricky, but when truly committed and using a good deal imagination and all, or at least, many, of the communications elements (communication cannot be stressed enough), both sides can get a good fulfilment and may work. Each relationship has its uniqueness and limitations, but like any in any relationship, it takes a good effort on both sides to make the experience worth.
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For more than 20 years, I've had an online ladyfriend who acts as a Dominant at times. Not fully satisfactory, but I'm glad I have her as a confident. We tried cum denial for a couple of months and it was very intense.
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Cyber Fun is how I see it nothing wrong I guess it can be somewhat satisfying but I'm too much into real time but I just play. Not seeking to move in with a DOM and have my life taken over-although it's a very nice thought and I'm flattered when offered a situation like that I admit...🤩
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Cyber relationships can work. The bottom line is communication is key.
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9/7/2022 10:38 am |
I have tried this. I was asked. I gave it a try. It worked for a while. It is actually quite a challenge. I chose to just end it. It was just much better to find out how your day went!
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9/7/2022 10:40 am |
Cyber Fun is how I see it nothing wrong I guess it can be somewhat satisfying but I'm too much into real time but I just play. Not seeking to move in with a DOM and have my life taken over-although it's a very nice thought and I'm flattered when offered a situation like that I admit...🤩
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Justine I love reading about your adventures with your near legendary Baron what a lovable scoundral🤩
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9/8/2022 8:03 am |
Cyber Fun is how I see it nothing wrong I guess it can be somewhat satisfying but I'm too much into real time but I just play. Not seeking to move in with a DOM and have my life taken over-although it's a very nice thought and I'm flattered when offered a situation like that I admit...🤩
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