Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > rondiri > My thought's, fun and fiction |
|
How does a bad Dominant damage a submissive… let me count the ways Article in Comments  |
||||
|
TRAUMA TRIGGER WARNING. Every submissive hopes for the kind of Dominant that will take care of their health and wellbeing, fulfill their wants and needs as a submissive, guide them and teach them to be the best submissive they can be and person they can be. Unfortunately, too many “dominants” leave submissives damaged and broken, traumatized, sometimes for life. Equally unfortunate, is the many ways it can happen. We all know the brutal trauma. The beating, the being forced to go beyond or the ignoring of limits time and again. Many times these actions leave emotional and psychological scars, beyond the physical injuries sustained. Then there is the trauma brought on by the words of the “dominant”. The put downs, sarcasm and verbal abuse that was never agreed to and is used just to hurt, shame and belittle. To some submissives, these traumas run deeper than the physical injuries that can heal with time and hopefully fade away. But the words can linger indefinitely in the mind. Just as bad is the silence, lack of attention and ghosting many submissives go through after they commit themselves to a “dominant”, making them feel unworthy of any Dominant. Cringe worthy is the lies that a “dominant” tells submissives to try and keep them from retaining any rights or dignity as a submissive in the lifestyle. Lies to keep the placid, keep them from leaving, keep them apart from family and friends. Lies that keep a submissive from trusting any other Dominant. Also, there is the lack of respect all submissives are due. Treating the submissive with no regard for what they do for the “dominant”. Giving no care or affection, or thanks for what the submissive has given them. I’ll finish with the unwanted sharing of a submissive. Letting others traumatize the submissive on top of what the “dominant does to them. Making the submissive feel like the lowest of species on earth. There are more way, as I’m sure many submissives can tell you. I didn’t write this article to trigger anyone’s trauma, but to remind us all that a Dominant has to be very careful with not only what they DO, but also what they SAY and HOW they say it, WHEN they say it, WHERE they say it. A good Dominant must be aware of all of this at all times. It may sound simple, a Dominant may be the most careful person in the world during scene play, physically. But saying the wrong thing, at the wrong time, in the wrong place, can do as much harm to a submissive as breaking a bone. I write this because I have a submissive that has been through so much of the above with others. I am so proud of her for the strides she has made thus far, and I felt the need to show others the NEED to be carefull, not only physically, but with the emotions and psychological aspects of a submissive. A submissive is too valuable a possession not to take care of. What a Dominant does and says with a submissive can affect the rest of the submissive’s life. That’s a big responsibility. © 12/3/22 Ronald Dirienzo
| |||
|
DOMs I may someday hook up with know I'm your plaything- so be careful not to break your "toys" ... Ha👅
| |||
|
This makes being who I am scary.. When shouldn't it be the most precious thing/time? I do have fears, but I also have dreams.. kajira belongs fully to Master Adomis4u2
| |||
|
well said. i just left a Dominant for a number of the reasons you pointed out. thanks
| |||
|
 Slave rick
| |||
|
A very worthwhile and timely warning rondiri, thank you for sharing. It reminded me that a submissive is also responsible for ensuring and managing his/her own safety and has the duty to themselves to be mindful of warning signs. All too often a submissive gets caught up in the attraction and sets aside personal safety in favour of thinking this one is "the one" with a commitment made in haste. Being a submissive doesn't mean we park our brain and abandon all caution. As submissives, we have the means to keep ourselves safe. For example, I have a safety circle of close friends set up that includes both Dominants and submissives to help avoid the kinds of situations described. They have been very helpful checking in for a reality and wellness check from time to time. In the meantime, I'm mindful that trust takes time to be earned. And consistency of word and action takes time to be seen. Once again, thank you for sharing this important message. tasina "like the seas, her depth and power will only be known by He who inspires her into submission”
| |||
|
Many fail to see the first sign but others see it as a bright red flag. The person that wants to completely isolate the prospective submissive from family, friends, work and her life. No cell phone, no computer, no internet, no contact with anyone but her dominant. I have seen it so many times. Most disguise it by trying to put it off as training......NOT!!! jmho and personal observations.  
| |||
|
DOMs I may someday hook up with know I'm your plaything- so be careful not to break your "toys" ... Ha👅 do not put it up wet.
| |||
|
Absolutely....I learned that at a very early age with toys and have carried that forward through the years. Use it, get it dirty, have fun with it but always make sure it is clean and ready for the next play session. If you are going to ride hard do not put it up wet.
| |||
|
Honey you misunderstand me💋. ... I am the playtoy the DOM must be careful not to break.... Ha👅
| |||
|
His words are always good.
| |||
|
DOMs I may someday hook up with know I'm your plaything- so be careful not to break your "toys" ... Ha👅 
|
 |
 |
 |
| Become a member to comment on this blog | ||
 |
×
×