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rondiri 65M
7296 posts
3/28/2024 12:27 pm

Last Read:
3/29/2024 7:24 am

Preconceived


article in comments

rondiri 65M
11155 posts
3/28/2024 12:27 pm

There was a time in the distant past of the BDSM Lifestyle that preconceived notions about the Lifestyle were few. Members of the Lifestyle passed on the basic premise, the rules and protocols to new members and those interested in joining the Lifestyle.
Then the authors and movie makers got involved in an attempt to make money, not to teach. Worse was yet to come with the internet chat rooms, and online porn.
Soon, the public at large was full of preconceived notions about the Lifestyle based on what they had read in a book, seen in a movie or role played in a chat room and seen in a porn movie.
Of course all those mediums only give the picture of play time. The kinks and sex. The exciting stuff.
New members to the lifestyle entered with the preconceived notion that, THAT was all there was to the Lifestyle. They had no idea about rules and protocols, what Dominance and submission consisted of, safety, health and wellbeing or even consent. Never mind vetting, negotiation, limits and all the rest of the nitty gritty that books, movies, porn and role playing never showed.
Having preconceived notions when entering any relationship can be a dangerous thing. Everyone can have different preconceptions, many of which can contradict.
Preconception, assumption and just taking for granted anything in the Lifestyle can lead to heartbreak and harm.
That is why communication is, what I believe, the most important of the four pillars. It all STARTS with communication and everything else builds off of communication. Without communication, all you do is assume, use your preconceptions and take for granted that your partner, long-term or hookup, understands the Lifestyle the same way you do.
And that my friends is a recipe for disaster.
© 3/28/24 Ronald Dirienzo


brandygirasol 54T
9427 posts
3/28/2024 6:46 pm

Sometimes I've got a preconceived notion I'm getting my ass whipped..😳


rondiri replies on 3/29/2024 7:24 am:

Artschoolgrad 46M
8666 posts
3/29/2024 7:03 am

preconceived notions then drive expectations which have a whole set of their own challenges


rondiri replies on 3/29/2024 7:24 am:

rydermantel 69M
24984 posts
4/5/2024 6:56 pm

I have a preconceived notion that every time I go to the supermarket the prices of food are higher. The Liberals keep telling us how great the economy is. Where? What country are they talking about? Not here. If the economy is so great then why does the price of food keep going higher and higher?

I ordered a sub and next thing I knew she was at the door looking for a handout.



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