Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > mollenda > My Blog |
|
Virtual Relationship In my opinion, it is a kind of substitute for a real relationship, giving both parties what they need. That is, the Dominant's ability to control, discipline, make decisions, the blissful state of being dominant and having the certainty of obeying orders by the submissive. For me, in turn, it gives me the opportunity to belong, to feel like someone else, to be guided or even controlled, to subordinate myself and to have someone's opinion. More than once I have received suggestions regarding the fulfillment of orders and tasks of the Dominant that must be performed outside the apartment. Going out, for example, without underwear or with something in yourself, appropriate behavior towards strange men. For most people, it seems unthinkable to give such far-reaching control over oneself to a strange Man. However, this action is due to my strong need to be controlled, to obey, to get rid of the need to decide and make decisions. To feel like a doll, a puppet, completely addicted, completely surrendered and devoted to the Dominant. In such a relationship, there is not much possibility of corporal punishment, in the form of rough fucking and other highly perverse behaviors, there will be psychological punishment. This type of virtual domination has more than once allowed me to satisfy my need to control and be controlled when there is no possibility or courage to have such a live and real relationship. The biggest problem arises when the dominant gets so involved that he wants to make it real. Another difficulty has always been the need to trust the Dominant that he will not publish online recordings on the net, that he will not blackmail (unless it excites someone). |
|||
|
Im loving reading your blogs; you have expressed nicely some complex considerations thank you for sharing. Taking your last point into consideration first and foremost; the risk of blackmail exists where intimate thoughts are shared. Where anything more visual is shared then that risk must be considered to have increased. You talk about dominants wanting to transition from virtual to real time, to me this really hits to the nature of a virtual interaction. Has it been discussed / agreed up front that this is virtual? If not then that lack of communication is harmful in any relationship (let alone a BDSM one). Long before the pandemic I would have confidently asserted that virtual relationships had a place solely as a gateway to real time interactions. I chose to play online with those geographically suitable for real time contact down the line. In the years building up to the pandemic my attitude changed, and for example my use of alt changed to being a place where I could talk to and interact with those who shared similar views. In doing so i started interacting with people outside of my geography where the interaction would only (could only?) be virtual. Then the pandemic struck; some of the young submissive's I had been talking to were cut off from everything. Living alone in their early 20's often in single bed flats and with mandates not to go anywhere enforced around them. I agreed with a couple of submissive's to enter virtual relationships where we knew there would never be a transition to real time. For me, they were good, I had fun and I was able to talk openly with them about their progression. I felt I was being selfish and satisfying my needs. But I was wrong; both of the submissive's (they don't know each other) were very attentive throughout the pandemic and in our subsequent conversations they have told me that the structure and rules I set got them through some mentally tough times. So to directly answer your question, yes I believe there can be virtual only relationships. However, they *must* be treated as *real* relationships with boundaries set, limits discussed and space provided for all parties needs. They can more than scratch an itch; and when it works it works *very* well. Are you looking for a new virtual relationship? MBD
| ||
|
Well said. I am a big fan of virtual for the reasons you list. It gives the sub the chance to honor her submission and the dom the opportunity to exercise his dom-ness. And I agree with the comments from MBD that virtual relationships work, but must be treated with the same care and attention as real ones.
| ||
|
As MBD says in her last paragraph; The virtual relationship can be very "real" in terms of emotional engagement - the antithesis of " quick mindless sex". To that end care must be taken and mutual trust is essential.
|
 |
 |
 |
| Become a member to comment on this blog | ||
 |
×
×