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NCDaddySadist 61M  
15 posts
2/21/2024 1:13 pm
What D/s is not----IMHO

D/s at its core is about relationships. It is not about sex any more than homosexuality, or Ward and June Cleaver’s traditional marriage was about sex (actually, it’s highly likely the Cleavers only had sex twice). Dominance and submission are not action words, they are personal character traits that can’t be shut off (they can but there are consequences to not living our lives authentically).

Many profiles of “dominant men” are about nothing more than kinky fuckery with little understanding or regard of the responsibilities involved in a D/s dynamic. Many submissive women who want to be ravaged or “tied up” have no idea the strength involved in emotionally surrendering to a Dominant man. Do either understand the emotional serenity a submissive feels within the confines of structure, love, guidance and His care? Do they comprehend the emotional fulfillment He feels by leading, watching over, guiding, seeing her blossom into her true self? Notice neither of those descriptors included any reference to sex. Kinky sex is great if that’s your thing but let’s call is what it is.

I have a strong need to promote, distinguish and preserve the integrity of the romantic and truly loving D/s relationship. Hell, all relationships, be it Ward and June, gay, D/s or whatever your proclivities may entail. My understanding has evolved over decades, and it didn’t come easily. But I believe it’s important to share in the hope that at least one person is enlightened a bit helping them experience their own authentic evolution. Peace.


NCDaddySadist 61M  
19 posts
2/21/2024 1:30 pm

Peace and calm, and not a whip or clamp in sight.


n_Tryst 50F  
291 posts
2/21/2024 2:48 pm

Thank you for sharing, NCDaddySadist.

A part in particular stands out to me most. "Do either understand the emotional serenity a submissive feels within the confines of structure..." When you posed that question, i felt convicted of not being my best self within my own journey. Convicted of giving up and becoming less than what i was ever meant to be.

Your words are tremendous food for thought and more than any humble opinion, That is, imho.

Please be well.

____________________________________
When i care enough to write my very best...


NCDaddySadist 61M  
19 posts
2/21/2024 3:34 pm

Thank you so much for those kind words. I'm glad they spoke to you and evoked some thought processes. We are all on a journey feeling our way through as we go. But we also need to seek that which we know will make us happy. I wish you great success. And be gentle with yourself.


uncommon1 66M  
1449 posts
2/22/2024 4:26 am

D/s at its core is about relationships.

D/s is a consensual, exchange of power
at it's core. It is only one dimension, within
a relationship.
Power exchange is a broad term for anything
that involves people with differing levels of
power, be that Master/slave, Dominant/submissive,
Top/bottom, Owner/pet.
BDSM is much deeper, an complex than the word
sex . . But at it's core, it is a power exchange dynamic.
The fact that you experience emotional serenity within
your relationship structure doesn't mean everyone
will or should. Each person is motivated by different
factors to delve into BDSM.



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