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Drdom2024 59M  
0 posts
5/14/2024 10:13 am
The Care and Feeding of Kinks and Fetishes


Kinks and fetishes run deep, so deep that the kinky and fetishists rarely have clear ideas about where their kinks and fetishes begin and the care and feeding of them might end.

We know, of course, kinks, or bends, in sexual behavior are expressed in some forms of non-conventional, aka non-straight, aka non-vanilla, sexual norms and desires, and we know that a fetish is generally distinguished from a kink by virtue of whether it enhances or replaces another’s sexual pleasure.

But that’s just Wikipedia talk.

This doesn’t begin to get at the overwhelming emotional response we have to things that can practically short circuit our normal reasoning skills, and perhaps compel us to literally forget what’s best for ourselves and others when in hot pursuit of sexual gratification.

“Impulse purchasing” has nothing on the means and ends to which we sometimes think we will go to satisfy kinky and fetishistic urges. And said urges are fairly common given some form of them are reported to be experienced by up to half of the world’s adult population.

We also know that kinks and fetishes are NOT necessarily connected to long standing myths about childhood trauma, fear of intimacy, and/or low self-esteem. There is, in fact, no data showing that people who enjoy kinky sex come from more troubled backgrounds, are less emotionally healthy, or are less self-regulated than everyone else.

Do some kinky people exhibit such traits? Of course, but so do many other people, and perhaps more, who take their sex straight, or with a splash of vanilla.

What it’s really mostly about for us is playing with power in spaces that we feel are emotionally and physically safe, which are nurtured by plenty of open communication and trust, which often take time to develop, and are usually based on mutually consensual behavioral agreements and/or long term relationships.

But if you are actually living the lifestyle, you probably know all of this and then some.

You know who doesn’t know this? The typical inexperienced money-grubbing con artist who seeks to exploit us and thinks all they need do is cater to the naughty nabobs of negativism in terms of quick and dirty, no strings attached appeals to the lizard brains on heat-seeking missions to find the right realm of non-reason to rub up against just long enough to doff sexual frustration and get off.

These fucks ironically don’t give a fuck about what drives their marks to this weak tea party, because they have no plans to leave with the ones they bring there. They just want our money.

So, fuck them, and the ignorant shallow premises they ride in here on. We have important work to do, they don’t get it, and so should get nothing more from us than a hard rail out the door (which should be fun to make happen for some of us, at least).


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