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Why do you do the things you do? The Mind of a Dominant , as a submissive, this is a fascinating, sometimes frightening, and curious place. What goes in there? It seems that being a Dominant is a lot of hard work. Not that being a sub isn't challenging in it's own way-it takes more courage than most can imagine, and it's definitely hard sometimes. But for me, it's as easy as falling out of a tree, because that's how my mind works. ESPECIALLY in the presense of a Dominant man. Now I know that D/s or M/s takes many beautiful forms and colors, but for me, I'm going go with the male Dom, female submissive pose in this post because that's what I know. Now I'm not talking about some 23 year old , with a dick and a flogger, with no idea how use either of them, but the ones that KNOW. They seem know just how pique your interest. They usually have lovely manners. You know, that THEY know their way into your mind and subsequently your panties. And if they don't know, they are willing to invest the time to figure it out. It seems to me, that while a sub can actually "space out" during a scene, the Dom has to become almost hyper aware in this moment, taking in every little nuance to ensure his sub's safety. He has to come with the idea for the scene, but have enough flexibility kind of go with the flow. He (hopefully) has put in the time and effort really "know" his submissive. He has not only control himself, but her as well. Quite frankly, it seems exhausting. When she is kneeling there before you, naked both literally and figuratively, and you know her darkest desires, her deepest secrets, her motivations, her triggers, her passions and fears, her fantasies and self doubt, her strength and her fragility. When you see her, in a way that perhaps no one has ever seen her before. You take all of her, her beauty, her flaws, every curve, lump and bump, her soul on display shining through her eyes. When you honor her through Dominance, is that the why? When she surrenders herself totally to you, knowing you could destroy her, or uplift her, and you choose the later, is that the why? What is the why? Thank you in advance for your input. |
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Obligatory Alt comment here
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1/1/2021 9:32 pm |
You definitely have the real dominate personality figured out. It's not hard being who you really are. If you're acting and playing a role it's different. Most here are jerk offs playing a role. I'm sure you've figured that out. .Just look at the comments people post. You will see men here begging for pussy all the time. It takes time to strip a woman of her defenses and have her totally exposed to you. It is all about the control. That's why I don't drink or lose my temper. When you lose your temper you put someone else in control. That's not to say I won't give someone an ass beating if they ask for it, or take an ass beating standing up for myself. As far as uplifting a woman. If I'm not a benefit to a woman then what good am I?
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If who she is makes it worth the effort, then it doesn't seem hard.
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The wise Dom always has her best interest at heart. That’s the why... Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.
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1/2/2021 12:17 am |
Happy New Year!
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It just is. "One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"
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The Dommes that attract me are those with an unexplainable charisma much like those you described as having the "know". The breathing becomes shallow and the heart beats a little quicker. Those dominant types that "know" need not explain why for it becomes so clear with every interaction.
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I'll be brief "INSTINTO"
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I can speak to why I choose the later, although again, experiences vary. Here is my why. First though, I would like to point out that what we are calling Dominance and activities of a Dom, we might not want to take for granted as part of being naturally Dominant. I occasionally like to separate out these qualities to point out that the truth in nature may be slightly different. Dogs can be dominant. Male apes display dominance. I do not believe that the positive attributes that we attribute to Doms are necessarily aspects of pure in-a-box-by-itself dominance, although we attribute them to responsible Doms because we have formed a community around the formation of frameworks that support adult responsible exploration of D/s. I do not believe that these responsible/caring/altruistic qualities are actually naturally dominant qualities. They are, however, qualities that we might all expect from an accountable adult (traditional) man - a good man has these qualities, but that is not the same thing as dominance. The Doms that we think of that have these qualities, have them because they exude from his natural masculine power that flows through him as a responsible, accountable, caring man. Bad men can also easily be dominant, although this community would definitely not refer to them as Doms or even 'men'. There are plenty of male creatures that also express dominance, where their dominance is not flowing from a place of healthy testosterone fueled positive masculine loving energy, just as there are plenty that do. This may be an unpopular view, particularly in this community, but is an unfortunate reality. We could consider that, dogs for instance - the dogs that are abusive, angry, always aggressive - while they may not be coming from a place of true doggy masculine energy, and are instead probably coming from a place of fear, insecurity, and un-resolved history of abuse, the result (and I suspect perception of the other dogs) can also still be viewed as dominance over other dogs, albeit not sourced from a place of positive energy. I hope I am making sense here, and why I am pointing out this distinction. By an examination of pure dominance all by itself with no other accompanying qualities, dominance by itself is neither altruistic nor evil, malicious or benevolent. Although the vanilla masses immediately assume negative connotations when they hear about it, and this community assumes a positive connotation, it is not necessarily either by definition, and can be neutral, positive, or negative. Ok ok, my why: I enjoy molding, twisting, etc. I like to use this for a positive impact where I can, for my own inner peace. I feel better about what I do to her, knowing that I am also improving her life. It may sound calloused - and of course there is an element of love in it - but if an ownership situation results - well in that case, it also makes sense to increase the value of an asset I own. 
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