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| Blogs > KainWilkus > A young man's old mind. |
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Queen - Queen II How was your Valentine's Day? Fun? Loveable? Get a gift, night of passion? Last minute chocolates? Mine? Dealt with dozens of dogs (nice bruise on my ass) and dozens of dolts (last minute VD gift givers). No gift. No declaration or show of appreciation. Received a phone call and gift card from the family. Right on par with how it was in elementary school, participation valentines. Depressing? Yes. Ain't mad about it, though. Went in with zero expectations so no disappointment. She received a spa treatment she saw on TikTok and thought it was cool. Not a boast or call for pity; a simple fact of how we show value to the other. It doesn't really matter. We are who we are. Did you see Wonka? It's great; full of charm and warmth. Not everything needs to be cynical, the world's bad enough. Anyway...to business. Universal awaits. Edit: Younger Brother - Train Only one hurdle: my birthday. Fills me with dread. Not my age, that fear came and went at the turn of the decade. Not that it'll be hijacked as was last year's; the Freudian slip of saying "parades" before "birthday" all but confirms it. No, the real fear is that nothing will happen which will cement this passive thought. Used as an aside or an occasional point of argument when it should've been the cornerstone of every decision and action over the last decade. I am not a priority, and there is no emotion attached to this thought. It is stone-cold fact. Any anger or frustration I have is towards myself for enabling this behavior for so many moons. I can't be mad at someone for being true to themselves. "You can't take away people's right to be assholes." Simon Phoenix I've given up sex for Lent. Masturbation has become as mechanical as brushing teeth, no joy in it anymore. I have better odds at winning the lottery or being struck by lighting than I do at being seduced or any kind of sexual activity. Therefore I need to rid myself of its power over me and start fresh. My goal for this year is to forgive myself; family curse is holding grudges so it needs to be simple otherwise it won't stick. "Then we get the khaki's, then we get the chicks." BasketBall But first, I am getting my night ride on Velocicoaster. That ride is dumb as fuck yet the view from the top hat is unbeatable. Movie recommendation: The Book of Clarence. Probably the most historically accurate Jesus film I've seen. |
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