Blog : the kindness of "friends"

159 posts
3/15/2020 10:29 pm

the kindness of "friends"

While I am no fan of Facebook, I have an account there because it is important to have a social media presence (apparently) if you are in the entertainment business, be it adult or otherwise. And since I not only make porn, I also make music (music videos too) I use the site fairly regularly. Mostly to self-promote, rarely to share anything personal, rarely to interact with anyone in a meaningful way. Even the people I actually know, have spent time with, and would call an actual friend are different on social media<b> platforms. </font></b>What I see, I do not like.

So it was quite a genuine shock and pleasure to see the following pop up a few days ago:

“Anyone out there really desperately need some $. DM me and I'll see what I can do. Personally I am doing really well right now but I know that not everyone else is.”

Now this was posted by someone that I’ve been Facebook friends with for probably a decade, but never actually met. We probably friended each other oh so many years ago because the person who posted this is also in the entertainment industry - though not “adult” entertainment. For ten years or so we’ve never exchanged a meaningful word or likely had a meaningful exchange. We do a random “like” or “thumbs up” or leave an empty comment or two here and there, but there’s never been a moment where that Facebook friendship ever felt like it evolved into anything more. I know I’m driving this point home, and you’re seeing the foreshadowing, but I’m going to keep telling this anyways.

As desperate for money as I am, I truly didn’t feel the post applied to me, but I was so impressed by it that I left a genuine comment:

“I've never met you, don't even recall "why" we are Facebook friends (though I think it's entertainment industry related) but I have to say seeing someone post something like this, at a "time like this" is absolutely phenomenal. I can't imagine the replies you'll get, like when relatives you didn't know you had appear after you win the lottery, but I commend you.”

And that, dear readers, should be where the story ends, but it does not. I let almost an entire day go by before I convinced myself that I was in dire enough need to swallow my pride and ask this complete stranger for help. I wasn’t sure what kind of reply I would receive, but what did I really have to lose, right? Her response was quick, and polite, and by the very next day I had a little something extra in my PayPal account. This sort of thing is not unheard of - I mean I’ve read stories about everything from people paying for the coffee of the person in line behind them to paying off their layaway items during Christmas - but it is in my life. This is the sort of lucky I don’t get very often, so I am grateful it happened now. I truly needed it.

Being self-employed again is tough on my wallet. At the moment I still owe a bit for February’s rent. My car is sitting in the garage because I could not afford to register it, or insure it, and I owe roughly $300 for two tickets I received while driving the vehicle with expired tags. There are a litany of other, smaller negatives but you get the point. I am broke, and this helping hand means I don’t have to go without a necessity like food. That’s how close to desperate it has been for me lately.

One final note: I asked this generous person if I could mention her name, or help promote her in any way, but she did not want that. I am going to respect her wishes and just tell this story and leave it at that. Some day I hope to be in a position like hers, and feel the same desire to anonymously help out some random person I barely know. Pretty impressive in my book.


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