Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > rosaenaluin > My Blog |
|
Experience, they say, I would like hear your idea about this. This is something most "dominants" have been asking me. "Do you have any real time experience with SM? , it is a bit of a strange question, because the "experience" i did have, was with someone totally different. So, yes i have some SM experience... BUT, not with you! So, the "experience" i did have, wont maybe not work with how you are, what you are like, what you needs or wants are.... It is not a one size fits all, sm experience... kind of thing, I also think, but i could be wrong, is that it are mostly bedroom only/sex role 'dominants' who are asking this.... I nEver had a man ask anyting personal. Or who did try build some kind of bond with me, as a perSon. Most Just wanted me be their kink proVider, it was always always aboUt THEM. nothing more! About what they wanted , be, for them, get off...It was allways ALL ABOUT THEM. So i cant Compare this behaviour... It bothers , though, i find it a very strange Question. And i decided no longer ansWer that question if somEone is going have a conversation with ... For , it is about the understanding of self, first. As a dominant or as a submissive, oR slave woman. The understanding that this is my destinY, my Core being. As he knows that BEING dominant is his destiny, his core Being, wich gives him tremendous happyness A kind of happyness he and i never felt in any vanilla relation we eVer Had. For me, this is also not about "playing" a role, get my fiX/satisfaCtion, sexually, or work out some sexual fantasy... or what not... It is about surrender. It is about power dynamic. But maybe i am just rambling along! 
|
|||
|
I just might be a very slow thinker.....  But, this is something that bothers me. It just doesnt feel right.
| ||
11/27/2021 1:01 pm |
The experience is unique with each pairing so the question doesn't really make sense. If a true Dom and true sub connect then they make their own experiences
| ||
|
Rosa I think you are right on the mark with your thought process and response.
| ||
|
I just might be a very slow thinker..... But, this is something that bothers me. It just doesnt feel right.
| ||
|
I so agree that each dominant has their own way of doing things......what was good for one might not work for another. It is with interaction that the relationship can flourish.
| ||
|
rosa I disagree a little - I do not think it odd , if after, rapport has been established for each partner to learn a bit about the experience of the other and their likes and dislikes etc I agree that each couple is unique but clearly some-one with great experience needs less guidance that a newbie My .02 worth  A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw Jenny
| ||
|
jenny, I understand your point of view. I think you are talking about negotiation and being compatible on only the kink levels... Then it can be a possitive part when the partner does have some experience in some kink activities....... Knows what a gag is, what hard limits are, what the trafic light system is about and more about that part of kink/ sm, That submissives have rights too.
| ||
|
Indeed, drmgirl, that is were it all starts, in my view.
| ||
|
Thank you, brandy 
| ||
|
Grey, You really think so? Thanks,
| ||
|
Alpha, I agree partly with your comment, i just dont go for the "true" what ever, doms, subs, switches... My true can be your biggest nightmare! So, in SM "true" should not have any value.
| ||
|
Thank you! Lokidokey. yes, it lacks depth, such a qeustions, as i feel it.... You start with everyone hopefully, with a fresh point of view.
| ||
|
My opinion is the same as greybrow, you are bang on the mark. Your sense of who you are is not a role, it is a way of being, and it is you. Those who ask do so only to guage your willingness to satisfy their sexual wants. That is not a relationship, it is using someone as an object, and you've made it clear that is not who you are.
| ||
|
chammeleon, Your comment brings tears to my eyes. It means a lot to me, what you say! That is indeed, how it always did feel, when i was approached by those kind of 'dominants', every time again, this was all they were interested in. I, did not matter at all!
|
 |
 |
 |
| Become a member to comment on this blog | ||
 |
×
×