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Lady_Pheonix 54F
52 posts
12/9/2017 11:09 am

Last Read:
12/12/2017 3:15 am

just a wander through a fractured mind


It's nearly chrimble, and everyone is talking about families, time together, you know, the whole christmas thing. I used to love this time of year, but now chrimble just reminds me of things i used to have.

I used to have a dad who would either insist on christmas at his time i.e. when he woke up we had it, if he was working, that could be 2am, 2pm, or 8pm!

I used to have a group of peeps from the british military i would spend a few days with, loads of laughter, drinking, and then trying to remember who the hell you were after 4 days!

I used to have a but when she found out about my life, she made the choice to walk away

i used to go out with friends singing and laughing and getting mildly drunk. We all knew each other so well we laughed before the joke, we knew what was coming.

i remember Domina telling me we would have a huge christmas, friends and family flown in. A huge tree in the middle of the house, with gifts all round. I was going to have MY kitchen to cook xmas dinner MY way. She had even planned ahead enough to talk to me about what W/we would have on the table for wine

this year, as last year, i will worry like hell about friends i know are alone. This year i will open my gifts to myself, and the stuff my friends bought "crazy aunty jojo", and then cook dinner for myself, and the old lady next door, and anyone who turns up.

in the evening, alone, i will sit with a bottle of a decent 24 year old single malt, and toast all those people i have lost in my life. And finally, i will remember the one really important thing ............

I will remember i made it to another hogmanay, despite the odds, the haters, and the buttmonkeys, laugh softly, and sing till my voice breaks

after all
every step is a lesson, and a victory, and a blessing

merry everything to you all,,, and please, remember the simple truth, You made it !!

DancingDom 74M
22611 posts
12/11/2017 8:49 pm

Merry Christmas to you. I suspect I will be spending the day with my cats. I will make my traditional breakfast of bagels with lox and cream cheese, onions, capers.

I will toast you back with Irish Whiskey in the evening.

"One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"



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