Blog : THE WOMAN THAT RETURNED FROM HELL

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9/18/2021 2:04 pm

THE WOMAN THAT RETURNED FROM HELL

The woman that has returned from hell is not easy to love. Many have tried. But hardly one did not fail. The weaks dont even have to try, because it will need more strength than those might think they have, you will need more patience, more resilience, more perseverance, more determination as a Normal has. It will requires a relentless and determined love that is anything but easy to defeat.

The woman that returned from hell will push you away for the time being. She will test you according to her thoughts and wishes to find out what he is made of, whether you have got what it takes to survive her storm. Because it is unpredictable - sometimes like a hurricane, an immense force of nature that rests on the rage of its deep suffering; other times like a light rain, calm, quiet, persistent and penetrating. She is one single contradiction, a pendulum that will swing forever between suffocation fear and the fear of loneliness, not knowing herself how to find and maintain the balance between the two.

The women that returned from hell may feel insecure today, even if she wont ever tell you, but tomorrow she might be overflowing with dominance, which she might show them all. She will beg for staying at your side while her hairs grazing behind her ear, dreaming kissing you while protected into your arms. But she never wont tell you so instead she will show you her independence, her need for space of freedom while longing deeply inside for loneliness and distance.
While you were asleep, she was awake, unable to slow down her thoughts, observing clocks and hunt time, make the broken parts fit, to understand everything herself. She fights her own demons and tries to kill her inner dragons. She is afraid of sleeping, because she might loose control. Knowing that tomorrow she will be tired and that her presence will suffocate her.
Therefore she will only need herself. If she talks to you about it, then you should love her.
If she pushes you away, you should love her even more. You will have to love her douptless and straight. New situations and places, people and experiences will make her anxious. She will want to be more independent and overcome her innermost fears but at the same time she will be as scared as a small alone in the big wide world.

Sometimes she needs to be brave to prove to herself that she has what it takes. Other times her inner self screams for you to take her hand and hold it firmly in hers. But sometimes she may not even know what she needs, and you must then be able to read it like in a book with worn pages, to understand what she needs when she is strangers to herself and does not know.
If she is courageous and enters the world alone, then love her.If she is afraid to refuse to take youre hand, love her even more. She will always live in the fear of not being enough and always being too much - an endless struggle for the middle course. If the scale precipitates in one way or another, it will be ashamed to be itself. If she feels too much, love her. If she doesnt feel enough, love her even more intense.

Sometimes when she does not hurt and the light will shine out of her eyes and her laughter will be a rare and precious melody. But sometimes she will be hurt so much by the trauma in her body; she will hurt in order to feel pain and anxiety herself. The light will weaken and the music will fade. If it is the light, love it. If it is darkness, love it harder. She will always love you with caution but with one foot out the door. She does not understand love without conditions strong enough to endure hard times.
She always will watch, wait and expect you to go first. And if you dont, she has written a truth on her heart that says that you will - And so she will try to sabotage the relationship; she will try to destroy it in order to leave first, trying to hurt you before you can hurt her. Thats the way she keeps control helping her to survive by making sure that she doesnt pass true hell never again.
If she wants to love you, love her. If she needs to hurt you, love her more. Getting out of control scares her. Never make her powerless, trapped or without her freedom. She has to dance barefoot under the huge blue sky, feel the sand between her toes and walk with wolves, while the wind pulls magic through her hair, because here alone she finds her healing.

Never cut the wings off, because as long she has the freedom to fly, she always will come back to you. Love her when it is easy and love her stronger when it is not so. Love her in a way that questions everything she has ever known. Love her because with every fiber of your soul you understand the gift of her love and truest submissivness and what it costs her to offer you her fragile heart.
She does not need you. She choses you, because you have what it takes to survive the storm and because you know how to love the strongest and hardest way ever.

kamatahna 33F