Just my thoughts
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 8:02 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2562 Views
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Hiku_82
41F SwitchAntarctica
Pics (106)Vid (1)Writings (22)
Writing by Hiku_82. Jun 15, 2018
NOTE 1 MIN READ
Im not here....
Im not here just when you feel dirty and want to get yourself off...
Im not here to help you cheat on your spouse or significant other....
Im not here to send you dirty pictures just because....
Im not here to just have an online cyber thing...
Im not here to just be who you want and do as you want....
Im not here because you have a few beers and feel like bossing someone...
I have wants
I have needs
I have likes and dislikes
I have boundaries.
If you arent here to get to know me as a person, a human being, someone with feelings, someone who has real life things happening....
Then im not here for you!
I am going to start deleting people that dont seem to give a crap about me personally! Realize i am ok with just being friends with lots of people, but i WONT cyber with you, send you pictures or indulge you with fantasies!
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How i view Daddy/LG
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 8:00 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2524 Views
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So their is a kink/fetish that i am into but its always categorized as taboo. The way that i like it and think about it is not taboo and i wouldnt;t want it to become taboo. i like wearing cute things that are little girl like (in private) and i like being treated like a younger girl. i like a Strict, controlling, but sometimes silly Man to be with.
For me when it comes to sex or bdsm type stuff the little girl part of me is still there as a submissive. I like the idea of an Older Bigger Stronger man having control over me, with discipline, punishment and rewards. I like being called little girl or just girl.
But in no way do i want them picturing an actual little girl, looking at little girls or anything of that nature. I wont even have those conversations. I just want them to see ME as a younger girl. I do not have fantasies about an actual Dad with a that is completely unacceptable.
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Calling yourself a bitch
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:57 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2541 Views
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When and how did it become a good thing to be a bitch? Being blunt to the point of being forceful and mean is all of a sudden accepted because that person says "im a bitch." Is it now cute, funny to classify yourself as a bitch? Being honest and blunt is for the most part I think is a good thing but its not ok when it goes further than that. And when a person themselves classifies themselves as a bitch its all of a sudden an excuse and acceptable for them to act and say anything they want.
Im not exactly saying this how i am wanting to but i think "you" will get the point.
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Little age?
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:56 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2547 Views
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I am consistently asked this question, it doesnt bother me or make me feel weird. But i really dont have an answer. I dont picture myself a specific aged little, i am just little..me myself...who i am, how i think, the way i talk and act. I hope im not obnoxious, i am silly, hyper, i have moods, i like cuddling. I love stuffed animals, disney movies, i like cute silly things. So im not really any age little, im just little.
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A no no?
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:53 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2529 Views
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So recently (within the last month) I have been experimenting with edibles. I have found that while on edibles I have a way way more heightened desire for sexual activity than I have felt in 5 years. How do people view playing while high?
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my switch mind....
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:51 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2659 Views
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While I have been growing and really embracing my Top side, finding new facets to explore. Growing in my confidence, loving the feel of control, training, guiding.
I randomly do miss being guided, the discipline, the servitude, loss of control given to another. I miss the being told what to wear, tasks, how to act. I miss feeling protected, feeling cared for in that way. I miss the hair pulling, the OTK, the floggings, the crop, the ice, the knives, the wax...being done to me. I don't miss it 24/7, but I miss it. It is a very interesting thing to have happening in my head, to enjoy talking to a sub and that relationship growing, but missing the part of me that still wants to be submissive.
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Vetting?
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:50 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2588 Views
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i have heard this word going around a lot more lately than in the past. i have read blogs, had SomeOne I'm talking to talk about. i might get in trouble for this or get some of my friends upset with me over this. But in the past 22 years, i have never vetted a partner. i have never asked other people their thoughts, or their personal times of actually being with a partner that i am considering. i kind of feel like i should give myself a time out or something, but i have never been taught how or that I should or that it's a normal safeguard that people do. Do people get upset if they are "vetted", do i ask if it's ok to do before i do it? i don't know how i have never done this and how i am alive and have only been with two people i shouldn't have been.
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I decide!
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:48 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2551 Views
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Let me preface this by saying, no I haven't gotten many rude or negative comments towards changes I've made on my profile which transfers to realife. But I have gotten comments like, oh you just going through the kinks/fetishes and deciding oh I like that today. I am 39 years old, I've been in this lifestyle for 22 years! Yes I am still curious about stuff I haven't done, yes I want to learn new things. I lost my Mom almost two years ago, and realized SHE created who I was, I thought I had to be a sub, because I wasn't strong enough to even ignore the narcissistic things she had said to me since I was adopted. When she died, I felt a sense of RELIEF, and I thought I was the monster. I have been on a journey to build myself into who I want to be.
One of those journeys happens to be that I can be a Switch, I can Top someone and they like it, crave it desire it. But I am also trying so very hard to learn to trust and be vulnerable again. I cannot be manipulated, I have boundaries. But a Sir has decided that i am worth taking it slow with me. Absolutely NO ONE gets to tell me who or what I am!
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Positive talk
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:46 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2576 Views
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i don't know how many times this needs to be said to me to really start focusing on what I can do and not what I can't do. I was born with health issues, I have mental health issues, I get more health issues, but honestly I'm fine.
I really really need to stop myself from thinking, talking, complaining about my issues. i still have a lot going for me physically and my personality. i just don't need to talk so much about my issues, the less i focus on them the less they effect me. i don't need to say it for attention, or for someone to care, i just need to talk more positively in my head and out loud.
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Domme? Top?
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Posted:Mar 31, 2024 7:45 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2024 1:8 pm 2601 Views
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So i myself classify as a switch and bi. I have had one vanilla "girlfriend", like 7 years ago.
To be honest i never thought about submitting to a Female before, because in my vanilla life women haven't been very pleasant with me, no obviously not all women haven't been pleasant with me but several, including my Mother. I have honestly compared a Domme to who my Mother was (she passed away February 5th 2020) and she was narcissistic and mentally and emotionally abusive to me about my weight, my eating, my activities or lack of, my hair, my clothes just everything.
So in thinking about submitting to a Female, it makes me nervous that that will happen again, especially because if i was with a Domme i would want them to be older than me. I couldn't handle a sadistic, over controlling, Female (i can't handle that with a Man either). Maybe i should just look for a submissive sister play partner 🤔 I miss being with a female, their is just something different from being with a Man (besides body parts) a sister play partner in my mind could be any ADULT age.
~I do think my Mom's death and me learning how to have boundaries has me a bit afraid of being vulnerable to ANY Dom/Domme. So it's not just women.
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