FARGO
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Posted:Apr 17, 2014 1:47 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2014 6:26 am 196431 Views
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"G, are you talking about the town or the movie?"
Neither .... It's the name of a new TV series that started last Tuesday.
"Any good?"
It was fucking GREAT! I'm not sure how to describe it though. Very dark humor, great acting/writing and, of course, a sufficient amount of gore.
"The star?"
Billy Bob Thorton ... Or is that Thornton? In any event, he's the comedian villain good/bad guy. One minute he has you laughing and the next it's 'Holy Shit', as he exterminates someone. He's always fucking with people's minds and very effective at it. Any opportunity to cause trouble behind the scene and he jumps on it. You love the guy! It's unlike any show I've ever seen.
"What about 'Pulp Fiction'?"
That does come to mind. Similar, yet different.
"So you're recommending it?"
Two thumbs up ... Way up! They made someone getting their skull cracked open with a ball peen hammer funny. I was laughing so hard, I backed it up and watched it over again. Billy Bob convinces a guy to piss in the gas tank of a car of a woman who was giving the guy shit - Then calls up the woman to report, "I'm looking out my window and there's a guy pissing in the gas tank of a red 08 Caprice." Then he chuckles (and you crack up) as the woman comes running outside and the guy pissing starts running off trying to zip up his pants, trips over a snow shovel and does a face plant.
"You're a sick fuck!"
They made it funny. That's what I'm saying ... This is a unique show!
"What channel?"
Fuck - You would ask Me that. Not a clue. Trust Me on this though, it's worth the readers figuring it out and watching it next Tuesday night.
"All this build-up and you don't even have the channel for them? WTF?"
Fuck off!
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Shake a Pudding.....
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Posted:Apr 7, 2014 8:56 am
Last Updated:Jul 2, 2014 1:15 am 254677 Views
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"G, is this a blog about masturbation?"
Jesus, you're dumb! No fuck head.
"Well, you made up the title!"
Many moons ago, probably before a lot of people here were born, there was a product called 'Shake a Pudding'. Might have been a 'Jello' product - I don't remember. It was a powdered substance in a container to which you added X amount of water and then shook. Voila! You now had instant pudding to eat.
"I'm sure the people reading this are now oh so fascinated. Is there a point?"
You're such an asshole! I was reminded of this product when I was reading a blog & profile about 'insta-Dominants'.
"You just add water and then shake them up really well? We could make a shitload of Dominants!"
No, numb nuts. Each of them would have their own recipe for getting from point A (reading about BDSM) to point B (Wow! I wanna be a Dominant!). The people, mainly submissives, reading this will know what I'm talking about. These self proclaimed Dominants now think that anyone identifying as a submissive must obey them at the drop of a hat, or other such nonsense.
"For real? I can tell a submissive to kneel or to suck Our cocks right away? Who knew? I'm liking this Instant Dominant product"
You could also hold up a sign professing "I'm an idiot and I may well live in my mother's basement". Anyone with any experience or common sense should be able to spot these 'puddings'.
"Even a new submissive? One that knows her inner core and has stepped forward into our lifestyle?
Therein lays the conundrum. A new(er) submissive may not have the wherewithal to identify the 'puddings' and they get sucked into their nonsense. The blog and profile I was reading was a prime example. "I'm a Dom, you're a submissive. Call me so I can listen to you masturbate while I watch you on cam. Good job, now I release you, slut!"
"No way - Just like that? I would have at least added 'Thank you' before I released her."
Thank God you're fiction! I was just making up a random example. I'll bet I wasn't too far off though, in many cases. What a great first impression this makes on a new submissive! I'll wager many have turned their backs on BDSM due to experiences like, or similar, to this.
"Guess I need to start behaving?"
You never get the controls, dumb ass.
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10 Random Confessions.....
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Posted:Apr 5, 2014 8:30 am
Last Updated:Apr 7, 2014 7:17 am 257287 Views
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"G, is this David Letterman?"
No dumb ass ..... Just a 'Tag - You're It' blog currently going around.
"Is it Deja Vu? Seems like I've been here before."
Yeah, it pops up from time to time.
"Are there that many random things about you?"
I guess we'll find out.
10) I'm named after a Cherokee 'code talker' in World War II
9) I could exist on Chinese and Mexican food.
 I've lived in 6 different states and two foreign countries.
7) I'm a 'Non-Active Duty' Marine.
6) I hate getting shots.
5) I haven't been sick in three years.
4) My middle name is Frederick.
3) I have flat feet.
2) Errol Flynn was my favorite actor as a .
1) I make a world class cheesecake.
"You made it - Yet no mention of Me?"
1) (a) I know a world class idiot.
"Fuck You!"
No, fuck you!
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Who knew?
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Posted:Apr 2, 2014 10:55 am
Last Updated:Apr 12, 2014 7:18 am 231370 Views
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"The blogs and other areas of ALT are now more screwed up than ever."
Boggles the mind. No, I guess that's wrong. It's getting to be par for the course.
"They should have quit when they only had some of it fucked up."
Either fuck it up fully or don't fuck it up at all - Must be their philosophy. Never do a half assed job.
"Anything else they can get screwed up?"
Just give them time......
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Born Free
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Posted:Mar 17, 2014 9:53 am
Last Updated:Aug 24, 2014 6:03 pm 224196 Views
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"G, why are you crying"
I took the cat back to where she had lived and set her free.
"Is that the feral cat you rescued back in December? The one that had her tail and part of her hind quarters totally ripped from her body?"
Yes.
"I thought you were going to keep her?"
So did I. When she went into the vet to get patched up, spayed and de-clawed, the vet had indicated her body had been so damaged that she may never be able to control her bladder again. He was right. I've kept her confined in the guest bathroom and just cleaned up after her as she's mended back to health and gotten fat.
"Did she start to get a bit tamed?"
She was coming along. As time went by, I could pet her and, although apprehensive, she loved it and even started to purr eventually. She was out of her natural habitat and had never felt human touch before or probably any form of kindness. When I came in to feed her and clean up, she'd run from her sleeping box over to behind the toilet where she felt comfortable and then would roll her body letting Me know she wanted some attention.
"Did you try to find her a home?"
Endlessly. Understandably, nobody wanted a cat who couldn't control her bladder. I even tried people who had a ranch or farm where she could stay outside. I just wanted to be sure she'd be fed and have water. With no claws, she wouldn't be able to hunt mice & birds very well or fend off other predators. Nobody wanted her.
"So you set her free back to her familiar surroundings?"
I couldn't stand to keep her cooped up in a bathroom any longer. Day after day after day. She needed to be back outside ... See the sun and sky, breathe fresh air and be able to run about. The weather has warmed up and her fur has regrown. It was time for her to be free again.
"you still go over and feed those feral cats, right?"
Yeah, I'll make sure they all keep getting fed every three days or so. I know she won't starve. It still broke My heart to set her free and I will worry about her.
"She'll be fine. She's back where she knows the turf, she's healed up and she's free. She is probably ecstatic to be free again."
I know, but it still hurts. I opened her carrying case by the bushes where she had lived and she scurried out quickly. I then started to put food in the bowls I have for the other cats, as she watched Me from within the bushes. Our eyes met and I talked to her for a little while. We had one of those human to animal moments and from her eyes, I could tell she was letting Me know she was grateful for the help and for setting her free.
"You'll see her when you go to feed the cats. You'll get over the hurt."
I know. She's got a guardian angel now.
"I feel for you, G."
We'll be OK Ruprecht.
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The blogs.....
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Posted:Feb 23, 2014 7:00 am
Last Updated:Sep 18, 2014 3:16 pm 229229 Views
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"G, how long do you think ALT is going to have the blogs fucked up? Photos nor even people's blogs are showing up now."
Perpetuity? That's five syllables Ruprecht - Did you understand?
"Just as long as you know what it means. Does it mean a long time?"
It's been long enough. People are getting pissed and there's no end in sight. It's like a game of 'Whack-A-Mole' .... One thing gets fixed and another gets broken.
"What was getting fixed in the first place to start the ball rolling?"
The concept of 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it' seems to be lost on ALT. God knows what they were trying to do when the dominos started falling. Some of us pay money for this and it sucks having it screwed up for so long.
"money? They charge for this sort of service? They'll extent your membership for a month I'll bet to compensate you for the hassle."
You're even dumber than I thought. Lemmings don't get compensated.
"I love lemons! Especially lemon ma-range pie."
LEMMINGS idiot. They gladly run off cliffs in droves.
"Or throw their money over the cliff? Maybe it'll get fixed soon."
Eat your lemmings pie.
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Ruprecht.....
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Posted:Feb 20, 2014 6:37 pm
Last Updated:Feb 23, 2014 7:41 am 230533 Views
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"What the fuck is a Ruprecht?"
That's the name of a fictitious character in the movie 'Dirty Rotten Scoundrels'. It's about two con men who fleece wealthy women of their money. One charms the woman into becoming engaged and once the trap is set, he introduces her to his brother Ruprecht, who horrifies the woman into breaking the engagement.
"What's the story with Ruprecht?
He's very much like yourself ... A blithering idiot - Ill mannered and uncouth.
"yeah, well fuck you! Who stars in the movie?"
As with many movies, there's the original and then there's the remake. The original starred David Niven and Marlon Brando. The remake stars Michael Caine and Steve Martin. Unlike many remakes, this one is as good as the original and they are both hilarious.
"Which stars do the part of Ruprecht when his act is called for?"
Marlon Brando and Steve Martin ..... And I'm thinking you.
"Ruprecht? My name is fucking Ruprecht?"
Not 'fucking Ruprecht' just Ruprecht.
"Fuck Me! Do I have a voice in this matter?"
Yes, I just spoke for you.
"Fuck Me! I couldn't be something else?"
Watch the movie and you'll be thrilled to be the third Ruprecht. Brando, Martin and you. That's pretty good company.
"Fuck Me!"
Quit your whining. It could be much worse.
"What the fuck is worse than Ruprecht?"
'Fucking Ruprecht'!
"Fuck Me!"
Seriously readers ... If you haven't seen this movie, do yourself a favor and do so. Watch the original first and then the remake. Chuck full of belly laughs! You'll thank Me.
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Wax
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Posted:Feb 19, 2014 2:26 am
Last Updated:Mar 15, 2014 6:54 am 229879 Views
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Let's talk wax.
"Brazilian wax?"
I was thinking more along the lines of hot wax poured or dripped on a submissive. I enjoy that.
"Do many submissives enjoy having that done to them?
Why don't you ask them.
"Is that dangerous?"
Can be if you have your head up your ass. You probably better not try it!
"Fuck you! If we had a 'safety' category, we could ask for suggestions and input about safely using wax."
I'm certainly not the Imperial Wizard of hot wax play, but I do know a few things. I'm open to other's experiences and suggestions.
"OK ... What do you know so far that you've utilized in your play?"
Let's see.... Hmmmmmm rubbing baby lotion on the submissive's skin makes the wax easier to remove, scented wax will burn hotter than non scented and produce hotter wax and that it's always good to drip wax on your own foot to gauge heat and distance. Go slow and watch her reactions .... Better to always be safe rather than sorry and have blisters to deal with.
"That's it? Amateur!"
Fuck you - I told you I wasn't a wax guru.
"What about covering the floor or carpet with something so you don't have a mess?"
That's a 'given'. Even you thought of that!
"Asshole."
I'd like people's input on safety issues, the best wax to use and any other comments they'd care to share. Come on bloggers, let's educate one another about wax play.
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Beauty
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Posted:Feb 17, 2014 8:11 am
Last Updated:Feb 21, 2014 4:00 pm 168894 Views
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"G, Is it only skin deep?"
It can be, but need not be. For some, their beauty is endless .... Inside and out.
"How do you know? Do you have to turn them inside out?"
Idiot. No, it's how they think, how they treat others, what they do when nobody is looking, the size of their hearts... Eventually everyone exposes themselves.
"Isn't exposing yourself illegal?"
Gawd ... How do I put up with you? I mean they show their 'true colors'. They show you the type of person they really are on the inside. The actual person and not the facade.
"But what if she's just a beautiful fox that makes you drool? Isn't that the trump card?"
No dumb ass. If she can't walk and chew gum at the same time, what good does that do you? Think brains, compassion, charm, wit .... The list goes on and on.
"Maybe we think with different 'heads'?"
Many do. That's good and fun in the short term, but I'd tire of anyone without intelligence. God knows how I've put up with you for so long.
"What about Me? I put up with you!"
You're stuck ... There's no escape!
"Exorcism?"
That's a big word coming from you. Even know what it means?
"Yeah, it means I'm fucked!"
Back in your cage.
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Categories?
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Posted:Feb 14, 2014 9:23 am
Last Updated:Feb 19, 2014 7:55 am 134756 Views
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A few days ago, I had a thought (Yeah, I actually do 'think' some of the time!). What is your opinion about ALT having 'categories' you can enter to post your blog?
Caveat. Let's 'assume' ALT can make a change to their blog area without screwing up the whole system for a week. I know, I know - THAT is really stretching it! They've managed to somehow screw the blog area up as we speak.... FUCK! I digress...
"What are you talking about G?" On another site I used to belong to (not Fet), they had categories for people where people posted their blogs. For example:
Politics & Religion
Poetry (I vote for this one so I can AVOID it) 
Relationships
BDSM Techniques
Safety Issues
Potpourri?
That is but a splattering of possibilities. Let's test this out. "OK G, where would you have posted this entry?" Given the above choices, it would have gone under 'Potpourri'. "Well, where would 'j-naut' post her Friday photos?" Same - Potpourri. "OK, well what about somebody wondering what type of candle wax is best to use?" That is perhaps an either/or I think. It could go under 'BDSM Techniques' or 'Safety Issues'.
Am I making any sense? Here's a thought. As you post today, just take a moment to consider which category you'd be using if this system were in place.
Might I throw out another thought? (Hey, fuck you!)  I think it wise to keep the number of categories at a minimum. I vote to keep them at no more than six (you get egg-roll with six). Accordingly, if the six you'd suggest don't co-inside with the six in My example, tell us what you'd take out and what you'd substitute.
"Hey G, if it ain't broke, why fix it?" Always a good question. I try to always look to enhance things ... A quirk of Mine, perhaps. If it can be made better and more user friendly (like a submissive or slave) why not have a go at it?
your categories may vary ... G
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