Born a w*ore without damn edits
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Posted:Mar 2, 2020 4:02 am
Last Updated:Oct 16, 2023 6:46 am 2978 Views
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This was suggested as a way communicate, since I have been effectively silenced here.
Anyway just had a big breakthrough in therapy. It turns that Dad wasn't first time a man had r***d me. I had suppressed this memory and as of last week I remember everything. I was reaaaally young and was lured into a mans apartment walking home from school. He was (maybe in his 60s...I thought every adult was ). He was friendly and showed some toys he collected (real toys not sex toys). He asked me to sit down then he left a few minutes. On his coffee table were hardcore porn magazines...lots of them. I think he waited me to pick one of them up before he came back in the room, because I did open one of them. I don't remember the words that were said but he started talking to me about how beautiful it was and if I had questions. Sex never entered mind in my life nor did I have any sexual feelings about anything up to that . He started showing me some of his favorites, most of which were hardcore penetration of a young small woman and an older man... and asked if I wanted to feel what it is like. I was scared but I didn't think he would let me leave so I said yes. He unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock which was hard. He told me I should try kissing it and pushed it close to my mouth. I was so scared I kissed it...then he told me to lick it, which led to him putting his cock between my lips. He said I should start to suck it, just like the girls in the magazines, so I did. He got me naked before I knew what was going on, still pushing his cock in my mouth. I was gagging choking then I felt my shirt being taken off, then was pulled up and he took the rest of my clothes off. He pulled me in and started kissing me , hard while moaning, forcing his sloppy tongue all over my mouth and down my throat, violating my mouth...I just let him...I was terrified, his hands all over my body running his tongue over my neck and chest. He was saying things and moaning all sorts of sounds. Then he told me to get on my hands and knees. I remember that so clearly...and he got behind me. I felt something wet being poured onto my anus (im sure it was lube) his hands all over my ass and body. He forced his tongue inside my mouth again then I felt his cock begin to enter me . It felt like a baseball bat was being forced into my body. I screamed in pain as he pushed most of his shaft into my small body then he pulled out and pushed inside me again. He did that over and over again, his full length thrusting, feeling like it was my hitting ribcage. He may have thought the screams were pleasure, because he increased his speed with full thrusts of his cock inside me . All I could do is grunt while he seemed do this what seemed like would never end. Then all I recall after that was his hands all over me and the sound of his slapping skin against me as he fucked me licking my back, pulling my long hair, grunting and groaning with his vicious pleasure. He came inside me, because when he finally pulled out his seeming gallons of hot cum spilled out of my body like a faucet. I thought it was blood. He kissed me again, told me to get dressed...I was paralyzed and in pain but I did, underwear soaking up the semen that was spilling from ass. Finally I was going to be able to leave and he gave me a model car kit as a gift (of all things that was truly weird) and said that I should visit again tomorrow. I got out of there and ran home. Showered and tried to cleanse his semen from my body...and somehow...I don't know...pretended it didn't happen. Never went back. I did not remember any of that until last week.
It explains a lot about why I am a nymphomaniac and have sex with literally anything with a pulse, why I have a r**e fetish, maybe why favorite position is doggie, why about a year after that happened I started doing strange but overtly sexual things, and literally every moment I am thinking about what happened so many decades ago and just cannot believe that remembering that trauma makes me disgustingly horny.
This was something that happened to me and me alone, and I do not wish this scenario to happen to any person or their loved ones. This is purely my own personal experience, traumatizing as it was, It appears have set myself in directions I never would have gone had it not happened, good or ill it is part of I am now, and I am thankful that I remember.
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Born a
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Posted:Oct 4, 2019 11:00 pm
Last Updated:Apr 14, 2024 8:04 pm 4654 Views
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This was suggested as a way communicate, since I have been effectively silenced here.
Anyway just had a big breakthrough in therapy. It turns that Dad wasn't first time a man had r***d me. I had suppressed this memory and as of last week I remember everything. I was reaaaally young and was lured into a mans apartment walking home from . He was old (maybe in his 60s...I thought every adult was old). He was friendly and showed me some toys he collected (real toys not sex toys). He asked me to sit down then he left a few minutes. On his coffee table were hardcore porn magazines...lots of them. I think he waited me to pick one of them up before he came back in the room, because I did open one of them. I don't remember the words that were said but he started talking to me about how beautiful it was and if I had questions. Sex never entered mind in life nor did I have any sexual feelings about anything up to that . He started showing me some of his favorites, most of which were hardcore penetration of a young small woman and an older man... and asked if I wanted to feel what it is like. I was scared but I didn't think he would let me leave so I said yes. He unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock which was hard. He told me I should try kissing it and pushed it close to mouth. I was so scared I kissed it...then he told me to lick it, which led to him putting his cock between lips. He said I should start to suck it, just like the girls in the magazines, so I did. He was naked before I knew what was going on, still pushing his cock in mouth. I was gagging choking then I felt shirt being taken off, then was pulled up and he took the rest of clothes off. He pulled me in and started kissing me , hard while moaning, forcing his sloppy tongue all over mouth and down throat, violating mouth...I just let him...I was terrified, his hands all over body running his tongue over neck and chest. He was saying things and moaning all sorts of sounds. Then he told me to get on hands and knees. I remember that so clearly...and he got behind me. I felt something wet being poured onto anus (im sure it was lube) his hands all over ass and body. He forced his tongue inside mouth again then I felt his cock begin to enter me . It felt like a baseball bat was being forced into body. I screamed in pain as he pushed most of his shaft into small body then he pulled out and pushed inside me again. He did that over and over again, his full length thrusting, feeling like it was hitting ribcage. He may have thought screams were pleasure, because he increased his speed with full thrusts of his cock inside me . All I could do is grunt while he seemed do this what seemed like would never end. Then all I recall after that was his hands all over me and the sound of his slapping skin against me as he fucked me licking back, pulling hair, grunting and groaning with his vicious pleasure. He came inside me, because when he finally pulled out his spilled out of body like a faucet. I thought it was blood. He kissed me again, told me to get dressed...I was paralyzed and in pain but I did, underwear soaking up the that was all over ass. Finally I was going to be able to leave and he gave me a model car kit as a gift (of all things that was truly weird) and said that I should visit again tomorrow. I got out of there and ran home. I got in the shower and tried to pull his out of body...then...somehow...I don't know...pretended it didn't happen. Never went back. I did not remember any of that until last week.
It explains a lot about why I am a nymphomaniac and have sex with literally anything with a pulse, why I have a r**e fetish, maybe why favorite position is doggie, why about a year after that happened I started doing strange but overtly sexual things, and literally every moment I am thinking about what happened so many decades ago and just cannot believe that remembering that trauma makes me disgustingly horny.
This was something that happened to me and me alone, and I do not wish this scenario to happen to any person or their loved ones. This is purely own personal and experience, traumatizing as it was, It appears to have set me in directions I never would have gone had it not happened, good or ill it is part of who I am now, and I am thankful that I remember.
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