"What am I missing?" The doc viewed what he'd written....
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Posted:Feb 23, 2024 4:57 pm
Last Updated:Feb 24, 2024 1:20 pm 5426 Views
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The doc had such a complex and unusual personality that that question was hard to answer, so I suggested that some rule may exist to guide him.
Like be vigilant and resuscitate worked for backyard pools.
Maths was a stone cold thing to me and I'd studied the laws of probability only to find my idea of being lucky didn't fit in anywhere in the long haul.
I looked at the equation the doc had put on the board and wondered what law it needed to make it more pliable/plausible.
On one side of the equation it was time alone that stood indivisible to an average mind.
But I knew the doc was different and could see things others would miss.
We were in fact a combination of the (can't see the elephant in the room) cornucopia of misleading 'coincidences' that fostered our arrival'
It was proved by science too that the mind could be programmed to be blind to what was right in front of it.
Basically you write a formula that allowed time to progress either way but in reality that seemed impossible.
So many would say that time is impossible, just an illusion.
The doc thought differently, that somewhere a gap existed where one could slip through.
It made as much sense as electrons jumping.
That if you provided the right excitation a movement was given.
So that's the doc's angle that those forces that necessitated a movement could be found and worked with.
Maybe first find a place where time didn't work.
Build a sort of Faraday cage that excluded time. A deep freeze where even time couldn't operate.
From an energy perspective, energy could not exist without time.
Energy and time were interwoven.
So that explained the doc's equation.
That by resourcing energy into another form it would be a way to mollify it.
If a field of energy could be deconstructed even into a kinetic kind then it would be like putting time 'back in its box'.
It went back to the big bad theory on how it all got started.
There was obviously way too much energy to do anything with, so for starters maybe you got things moving to soak up some of the energy and then turn it into spinning balls (atoms) that had opposing charges, matter and anti matter that would mostly be even but upon annihilation one would emerge as a sorry but surviving thing.
That would form something like a galaxy from a nebula.
It was all about taking everything that existed and fitting it back together to get inside the mind of the creator.
Who is an inter-dimensional traveler.
Time existed in a loop in one dimension and in others a non reactive one.
So it was between dimensions that a highway existed where you had a free ride.
Then it was just a matter of getting the electromagnetism right to step into that border to get your slip.
So that's what had happened at cern. They'd accidentally hit on something that was making time waves.
It was now in the walls there and the tools the doc had given me showed that.
It was also shown in the constant that light was getting a free ride.
And the particles being accelerated approached the speed of light. ???????
The doc made one stroke on the equation the point where the graphed lines would never touch.
He forcefully and emphatically stroke the chalk to isolate that point.
"Right here!" He said is where the confluences of time occurred. Odd that time couldn't exist right there.
"any vehicle that traveled through that point would be exposed to absolute zero, as heat needed time to exist.
Not the absolute zero we know but the real one. As low as it can go.
Our machine, the one we'd build would get as cold as that and when re-entering a place with atmosphere would cause a layer of ice to instantly form covering it.
Another clue about how the machine should be sealed.
It reminded me of Feynman sticking the rubber seals in his iced water to prove his point. 
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Healing !
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Posted:Feb 23, 2024 8:06 am
Last Updated:Feb 23, 2024 7:11 pm 5024 Views
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Being truly free is the highest gift I know off.
And traveling to remote places to meditate and to extend myself mentally is a coming of age for me.
A sense of arriving to my destiny.
A road traveled alone can do that.
I like that the higher state of mind does not operate on there having to be a God.
You may feel a oneness with the guiding hand of a creator, and the proof is that you do exist and have channeled into that higher place.
It goes beyond the idle promises given by most religions !
The meditation masters fully awaken the mind, and that is proven and they have the highest brain activity.
It opens the minds energy portals to freely exchange your thoughts with everything that surrounds you.
Happy thoughts touch deeply in your soul !!!! This is the way out for people trapped by ill-intentioned controllers.
Wicked regimes will crumble when that awakening happens ! It is our destiny to achieve that. And we do !
It is the true way the future unfolds !!  
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"Big bad theories" and Hadron's 'bangup' subterfuge !
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Posted:Feb 22, 2024 1:42 pm
Last Updated:Feb 23, 2024 7:16 am 4997 Views
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Science was in a state of torn realities now.
The only promising experiment that could not only blow the doors wide open in our grasp of true reality but could utterly take them right off their hinges was threatening to explode into a new field that would uncover how interwoven multi-dimensions worked and held together.
And time had weaknesses if you knew where to look.
An equation could even be put on a blackboard to give differentiated values for the intersecting points.
It showed that the components of what we loosely called time had an escape built into it that the aliens had found and could use to 'jump' their craft by.
It was all to do with efficiency and the most remarkable thing was just how much you could get from so little energy if you knew how.
The hadron collider was accidentally producing those time waves, disrupting the time continuum, taking it to that precipice that separated past, present and future.
My scientist friend had a finger in many pies but this one surpassed all the rest.
It is amazing that something so fundamental had escaped our grip. All it took was an e=mc2 logic to 'crack' it !
If Einstein was still around he could produce another brilliant equation to cover it.
It was purely a miracle too that by accident a material that acted like a time crystal could exist and be had.
In short how it worked was like putting your outboard motor onto the wrong end of the ship. By creating a vacuum to move into.
My scientist friend had worked it out and was building a proto type to experiment on.
He reasoned that it would jump through things with no damage caused and would act like a protecting force field the way 'Enterprise' worked.
You could lift with the tractor beam too.
I would help the 'doc' (my nickname for my scientist friend0 build the craft and be free of the confining laws that I hated so much. It would be a race through time to understand time.
We had a head start though as the Nasa scientists were still scratching their heads, only being able to make crude flying machines at this stage.
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"We got a "Hog" 'Real life Lord of the flies'!
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Posted:Feb 21, 2024 2:29 pm
Last Updated:Feb 22, 2024 12:56 pm 5085 Views
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An excited b#y related the news and all the rest were suddenly quiet, 'they'd got a hog' !
God help him !
As far as impressionable books go I guess Lord of the flies was close to the top.
It was a much older women who gave me the book to read and I wondered what on Earth her interest in that book could be.
She'd been introduced to me and I could tell right away that she was different.
We'd spend some days playing the whole 18, getting to know each other and she'd cook up a dinner that was utterly my kind of food, a large steak still pink inside and a crisp singe locking the goodness in.
She was German she told me and that's why she pronounced W differently.
In her language it was pronounced as a V.
It seemed important to her that I read Lord of the flies and it wasn't the only time a book was forced on me.
Another girl had one about witch stuff and had underlined a character who was supposed to be me.
Another crazy women, was my thoughts.
It was learn your role down pat so we can start the game.
Games?
It was odd how real life took things in a different direction.
Us cadets had taken the skills taught to us to the forest in our own time. A battle would be fought and prisoners taken. I'd watched Rambo first blood heaps of times and I was known as the silent assassin by the other cadets due to my knife throwing skill.
Many years later I still enjoyed practicing my throwing.
I thought on one walk with the b*y I'd take my knives and teach him to throw.
Would have my scientist friend up in arms too I'd imagine.
Anyway so what all these things had in common was a 'sic' notion of dealing with prisoners. The 'hogs' as one boy put it.
The older woman had thought a lot about me as her hog.
I'd been given Lord of the flies to read so I could be her 'hog' !
There was something alive and a bit scary inside her.
Something that needed to come out !
I could feel something wild was in her, and it was as plain as the rare done steak she'd placed before me.
She was my kind of woman.
Exciting to be around !
So I read it !
Then we'd have to take it apart and explore what aspects interested us.
She liked the idea that they'd be getting around naked, clothes were thrown off as unnecessary things.
Little bare bums was the order of the day!
And caging a hog to poke it with sticks!
I'd heard that the modern were into the same games I used to play, only now with paintball guns.
I could perhaps train the boy and get him involved in it.
Give him something to do. Maybe he'd revel at it and strike up a friendship or two.
So without mentioning it to my scientist friend I went with boy on his morning walks and told him about what I'd learned in the military.
The best ways to operate to avoid detection.
The art of stealth, catching your enemy by surprise.
I would slowly introduce him to that.
I also prompted him on how to offset that wild excess with meditation.
Meditation was the crack in the wall that would hopefully expand and consume him and take him on a different journey.
If it happened he'd turn into a new person, losing connection as the old habits lost ground.
I could imagine him being the quiet studious type, careful and not impulsive at all.
So I could firstly gain his trust and start him on the new adventure.
And have a little fun along the way!!!!! Turning him into a paintball warrior !
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"You'll write!" "Goddammit ,you'll write !"
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Posted:Feb 20, 2024 3:42 pm
Last Updated:Feb 21, 2024 3:03 pm 5245 Views
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He said as he slammed his fist down emphatically agreeing with my suggestion !My direction was decided and despite having so much against my success I was occasionally amazed that my sentences occasionally blended together and my meaning conveyed.
It wasn't only music that was mind blowing to me but catching the odd poetic assemblage made me appreciate the power of the word.
I had no experience at poetry but I loved it.
I was constantly going back to my brief schooling, being treated like a freak and put together with who really were 'challenged' and struggled to read anything let alone understand it.
So many hidden nuances could be found in a single sentence.
Also a meaning given whether appropriate or not.
So somehow I'd got that!
In many ways we were already in the apocalypse and society was breaking down all over the place.
I was reminded of that movie where the heroine had book and books were rare and the stories they told had to be protected.
For me my lonely days were corrected by what I found in the revelation and I heard about a k&d well learned in psalms.
He'd come up with the appropriate one for the trouble he'd found and seemed to know about the words and what they meant.
He must have had help.
I could imagine someone else with a cherished book of poetry, no capable of understanding it fully but could read it and impress people who sometimes were much older and actually did understand and appreciated the 'tryst' given.
Later on I found the girl with the law degree who'd found her mind an intolerable thing, poisoned by the huge breath of law material she'd learned.
Any time you talked with her you could see the cogs turning in her head, measuring up what you said with the law, and giving her verdict, her weight of words on where you stood with the law.
Maybe she could pop out the odd precedent too !
Also I see someone found an ancient Egyptian debate about switching to the word system. (funny but.....)
Further on Shakespeare elaborated on the meaning of a shrew. He needed to invent words to bridge a gap between the staid wise ones and common people who laughed at Shakespeare's hooligan graffiti aimed at high places.
I could collect the right words and use them like gems, slotting them into the right place.
That thought gave rise to how foolishly we threw around words, teaching young ones to do the same.
And instead of the wise ass slingshot of words in self defense we should take time to answer or hold our silence.
I decided I would produce original stuff, only to do with what I'd found already suited me.
The grandeur and mind gorging effects of the revelation would be my style.
God help me ! if I butchered it up to prophesize(american) something unintended.
Maybe even that I was a prophet, sent to Earth for that purpose.
It seemed like a good time to be a prophet and a misdirectioned World was crying out for one.
I propose a new way of thinking, that music and reverence to all that is beautiful be protected.
That life was better that way, for me life was better wearing headphones. I noticed that my hearing was keener when I took them off, the frog sounds almost deafening, and birds I hadn't noticed before had an urgent message.
I'd been spending lots of time on the mind machine and experiments included testing if I gained psychic powers by identifying what was left on a table in the next room.
The ability to float like a near deather and see myself from a left the body perspective.
It was kind of like the scientist had a job in mind that could use those talents.
Bypassing security to breach a high security area perhaps. The auctioning off the secrets in a new slant on Wikileaks ! Now the psychics made 'it' leak !
I'd built a collection in my mind of psychic stuff, one was how the African girls would touch their forehead with their left hand and send a message home.
"I'm coming home now!"
Or the way the Aboriginals would push the sticks in their fire together as they made contact with whoever.
It was the first mobile phone network. You needed that too when the huge distances had to be managed.
We could very easily be without our modern devices too.
Thrusted back into the stone age. Reverting back to the lost ways.  
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Taking libations! Maddness over method !
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Posted:Feb 19, 2024 1:45 pm
Last Updated:Feb 20, 2024 2:31 pm 5236 Views
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I'd built up a trust with the b7y sharing his morning long walks through the bush.
We'd decided to give him a surprise and on that day I took him out to a friend of mine who had a small studio where he arranged and put together his new age music.
The boy boggled at the sea of controls but liked to play with the instruments he was given to try.
Music would become the cure basically and seeing the k*ds joy at producing sound reminded me at how wrong I'd got it when growing up.
There it was silence that drew me into conflict with time.
My silent world memories still haunted me and how different it should have been made me postulate about if i'd taken a different track and avoided the road I'd taken.
When we arrived back the b8ys own studio had been setup waiting for his surprised look, and after some time he seated himself at the drum set and played along to the music I was playing.
So I was doing my job, progressing along the lines of a cure and one day who knew where it would go. maybe survival as people often succumbed to mental diseases.
A short life of highs and lows.
I was being taken along on a much higher level now, a kind of uncharted territory. Still music though and it gave me ideas about the whole scheme of things, that by taking a glorious step to perfection was the goal of the creator.
Yes that was it, I would help the b*y to be cured and continue on my own road.
The thing was time could be bearable if there was music.
Time and music went hand in hand, a perfect symbiosis in my experience.
Everything went well and even when the boy dropped into one of his fits and destroyed some stuff it was no bother righting things up again.
Playing music was a frustration till you got the hang of it. I thought of 'Garbage' (the band) destroying guitars and other stuff involving the desecration of pianos.
Destroying that musical sh!t was normal behavior!
Later that night I was spending time with the b&y and the destruction he'd dome rested on his mind and he was accustomed to receiving a punishment from his uncle for acting up.
Did he expect the same? One thing I loved about spending time in the military was being massaged after a tough day training and I thought that was the best treatment.
I told the b*y to just relax and that triggered him to jump to the fridge for some ginger beer that was doped with his medicine.
He threw me a bottle of it and my mind raced about what was in it.
I thought 'what the hell' as I twisted the top off and took a sip of that cold beverage.
It was good !
I imagined the k*d was addicted to it.
I explained to him how the massage would work and he removed his shirt and lay face down on the bed.
I got to work employing all the favorite moves I felt on me, paying attention to working out from the spine to the shoulders and the b*y was soon in a pleasant rapturous state,
I was working my hands down lower and asked him to unzip his pants to let me work right down his spine to the buttocks.
The way it had been for me.
His nice little buns would work as I did the massage.
He silently motioned me to stop getting up and going to the closet to fish around in before producing the cane.
I assumed it was the one his uncle used and then he re-positioned himself on the bed as he was lowering his pants this time to expose his little butt.
I guessed this was a habit I was now expected to take over from his uncle.
His body a little tensed up now at expecting the punishment.
I would not be acting up with anything harsh as I knew how bad that was by my own experience.
I would be kind about administering the 'justice' for the days misbehaviors.
I gave his rump a massage with my hand before giving the first stroke then massaged that too, building up gradually.
Soon I could see him getting pleasantly stimulated and working into the high he was used to at his uncles hands.
I was enjoying watching him taking it remembering the highs I'd been given myself.
I remembered getting around the golf course after I'd taken a good beating the night before and reaching down to get the ball out of the hole was a wicked thing I felt in my reddened butt cheeks.
So I decided the b*y could enjoy that on his next morning walk!
I gave it to him good and put a reddened smile to his cute little buttocks, the boy tightened in rapture his face taut and his mind locked by the hard thrashing that was being given to him.
His face drwn tight and tears ran down the red of his face,
Then I stopped consoling him a if the punishment was cruel on me too, and I was glad it was done.
I gave him another warming massage and along his back and shoulders then working lower to his rump which was noticeably warmer now !
This brought back some memories from the past, some still strange and hideous at the hands of deluded , sexually obsessed miscreants!
Then it was my own eyes that became damp. I remember one game using my kicks as defense and having to expose my target in doing so.
Then not being able to even get close he used the short whip to 'wear me down' as he put it !
It was sick, but I couldn't help going back for more !
It was my father whose beatings took me on that journey and I understood the ones on the same journey.
It was an emotional rediscovery for me.
Eventually he calmed down ready for sleep and I left him like that and snuck out the door.
Of course my scientist friend would be told about everything and I would be advised about his protocol.
The plan must be stuck to or improvements wouldn't be achieved.
I'd be given another job for getting out of order.
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Uncovering regressed memories.
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Posted:Feb 18, 2024 1:05 pm
Last Updated:Feb 26, 2024 1:21 am 5994 Views
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I was temporarily between jobs with nothing to do really when my scientist friend said he could use a second opinion about his treatments and since I'd been there myself I may be able to shed some light on their experiments.
So I went out to the farm and it was so beautiful to out in the cool crisp and clean air.
The scientist showed me the work they'd been doing and the results they were getting.
The progressions they'd made with the thin paranoid schizophrenic.
It seemed like a lost cause to me and I talked about what it was like to turn the corner on the disease and that I didn't think the b&y had it in him to do as I did.
The scientist heard me out emotionless and maybe agreeing with me and then he told me about recent things they'd found.
That the boy would regress to another time in a rural setting in what seemed to be Tudor times and they had crude ways back then to make the servants tow the line, with castigation, religious duties and Omg I thought about the woes that had gone on in the church.
The scientist took a tape from the collection he had and popped it in to play, I suddenly felt trapped like a captive audience but my curiosity trapped me in my seat.
They'd recreated the ancient punishment to transport the B8y back to his previous life, and this all took place in a lofty barn and goats and chickens were there to complete the illusion.
The boy was handled by period dressed servants under the orders of the master of the house and they soon had him stripped, protesting against the crime he was committed of.
Then the pulley blocks were put into service and the boy was hoisted by the ankles up in the air.
I could easily imagine how the boy felt at being naked, not able to cover himself and to face the torment of being brutally whipped like that.
I felt transported back to when I had the disease and this type of thing thrilled me.
It would send me on a high too. Better than anything I'd felt before.
It would also trigger the more powerful catatonic state and emotional responses too.
It reminded me that my emotions had mostly died since being cured.
Part of me wanted to go back to who I was and feel the delight of being "sick".
The boy was taking the strokes fighting the demons in his head and seeing the chamber maids in his periphery watching on.
They giggled with each other at the boy's silly little bum, barely an ass at all.
The ass was gaining the most attention from the whip now and the painful red stripes could be seen.
"The b*y agreed to it!" Was what the scientist said allaying my concerns.
No doubt I thought I could have been over the moon from such a thing.
Apart from making a 'porno' I wondered what was the point.
Maybe to show the starting point from which a cure would progress from.
Something stirred deep within me though, a repressed memory perhaps and an excitement was definitely still there within me.
Later that night over dinner and wine I felt more like divulging what I'd felt when watching the video.
That in some way I missed the highs I once had. It was never fully explained to me what I'd be losing when offered a cure. I'd lost a huge part of myself.
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Outlining paradise !
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Posted:Feb 17, 2024 1:05 pm
Last Updated:Feb 17, 2024 4:19 pm 5624 Views
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It felt like the sixties again, some would say , but this time the establishment was in disarray.
Let the people eat and enjoy their cake was all they could do.
I gave my scientist friend everything I'd collected on my trip to the Lhc and half expected him to chuck it in the bin after perusing it saying it's just a 'bang up' job to deflect from the real experiment happening behind closed doors there.
The one to do with time warpage.
I'd be rewarded for my efforts though and was given a long session on the 'accumulator' a name I jokingly gave the machine.
It reorganized the brain function, stimulating the frontal cortex.
It made me feel enlivened and young again and it was easy to feel sexy again and I was amazed at how hard I'd get.
It was like being back in real time, life was a thrilling game again.
I'd slip into computations and be able to rotate my images through a third angle of projection.
I was the product like a Frankenstein creation and would help turn a profit one day too.
He could sell his machine once it was proven to work and it would transform people completely.
Something the '60's couldn't do.
It was easy to imagine how living was supposed to be. Like awakening in the garden of Eden to be blissfully aware of existing.
You needed nothing more!
Your mind and heart would become interconnected in the way the Kim Peek was showing.
The mind would be given free will and the minds hunger to learn would be unhindered.
My habits had drastically changed since being on the 'program' and now I'd be seeking to learn more at any odd time of the day.
I saw that in the average persons life the barrage of pointless distractions. Abusing the gift they'd been given, the one that had the profoundness and breadth of a universe.
We were all much the same however few would ever know what it was to be fully switched on. My favorite part was how life became unapologetically sexy.
No matter what I was working on I felt that sexy cushion always by my side.
It nurtured and stimulated me.
It turned the brain on too and the brain activity expanded exponentially.
No longer struggling to remember things and in this new state you felt like a third party watching on as the mind did all the hard work only sending you what you could understand.
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"Brainwashed!"
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Posted:Feb 16, 2024 9:56 am
Last Updated:Feb 17, 2024 12:14 pm 5665 Views
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The '60's were relatively liberal times. You drank from a bottle as you drove, a coke or something stronger, no one gave a sh&t.
Roads were quiet and no get rich prospects to make a buck. Girls were a lot thinner and Elvis made movies. Smoking too, lots of it !!!!
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What is "waking up?'
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Posted:Feb 15, 2024 8:51 pm
Last Updated:Feb 16, 2024 9:38 am 5403 Views
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I'm finding a quest for knowledge that I never had before.
I theorized about what drove Kim Peek to want to learn.
I just didn't know, but as I became more like him because of the "activation" program I began to understand how the allure could work.
Firstly that the brain can find itself in a rut, a condition or occurrence you feel/suffer the effects off but you cannot escape it.
I've been there.
So Kim's wild accumulative of knowledge may be that he was hoping to find a cure.
An insatiable desire to be cured.
It would be like being stuck in a dream with no escape.
But I did escape and now experience something I'd read about, and that is once you'd tamed your personality you could be free of its controlling you.
Then you'd experience a clarity of mind by escaping the clutches of your demanding personality.
Maybe you wouldn't be seen as a target anymore as no target could be seen in you.
Maybe now a peaceful glow would have taken its place and you do see others differently and it now looks black and white on how they were suffering with their own personality.
You'd like to help them out, to step out of the chains that locked them in place so they also could indulge in the peace.
So amassing a knowledge bank was not my prerogative but it did fascinate me, the way people had succumbed to evil intentions.
As a new threat is set to decimate populations (a candida) I wondered about what's befallen people in the past and what history was being uncovered.
Blame was heaped on Columbus for transporting Syphilis but uncovering the bones from earlier than that uncovers that it was well established before Columbus ever set sail.
Another Mandela effect you may say. You may not agree with this effect either , I distinctly remember Mandela becoming President once released from the Island.
Also I feel the pull of another age, one that I participated in.
One that Shakespeare would have strung his traps in, in the hope of catching game. Maybe a trout to take home to delight his parents.
I guess that's my true home.
We don't get near deather's claiming to come back from the future. Do we?
If we did that would add to the simulation debate.
Point to how there's no time on the other side.
That the you, past present future exits all on one plane.
Why not? Boadicea was fighting the Syphilis bearers! The Romans had it at that time! In Pompeii's archeology !
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